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January 6, 2006
St. Peter and the Politician
hile walking down the street, a well-known politician is hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven, and he is met by St. Peter at the entrance. "Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see such politicians up here, you see, and so we're not sure what to do with you."
"No problem," says the politician, "just let me in".
"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from 'on high.' What we do is have you spend a day in hell, and a day in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."
"Okay, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the politician.
"I'm sorry but we have our rules," insists St. Peter. And, with that, St. Peter escorts him to the escalator and he descends to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a club, and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who'd worked with him. Everyone is happy and they run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times.
They play a great game of golf and then dine on crayfish, caviar and champagne. Also present is the devil, who's really a very friendly guy; dancing and telling jokes. They're all having such a good time that, before he realises, it is time to go. Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the escalator starts on its upward journey.
The escalator goes all the way up to heaven, where St. Peter is waiting. "Now it's time for you to visit heaven." So the pollie joins a group of contented souls, moving from cloud to cloud playing the harp and, before he realises it, the 24 hours have gone by, and St. Peter returns.
"Well, you've spent a day in hell and a day in heaven. Now choose for eternity."
The politician reflects for a minute, then answers: "Well, I never would have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I'd be better off in hell."
So, St. Peter escorts him to the escalator and he goes down, down, down to hell.
Now the doors of the elevator open, and he finds he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and debris. He sees all of his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash, and putting it in bags. The Devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder.
"I don't understand," stammers the pollie. "Yesterday there was a golf course and a club, we ate crayfish and caviar, drank champagne, danced, and had a great time. Now there's nothing but a wasteland full of detritus, and my friends look miserable. What happened??"
The Devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning; today you voted!"
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Posted by witnit at January 6, 2006 12:20 AM
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