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August 31, 2005

Typhoonery

ell, we're over halfway through this thing. The department store and supermarket has closed for the day so I'm feeling a bit cabin-feverish. Wind and occasional rain outdoors. Apparently one person has been killed by this typhoon. We're not in Katrina's league, thank gawd.

Odd looking clouds outside. I haven't posted pics because there simply isn't much that looks very interesting. Got a good book and have been watching a YES documentary. YESSPEAKS, narrated by Roger Daltry. He's terrible at it. But it's good to see interviews and the 2003 concert with the classic lineup of Anderson/Howe/Squire/Wakeman/White. Most of them now live on the west coast of the U.S.

Oh yeah, I ordered room service for lunch, their SUPREME Cheeseburger. I swear to gawd it was less than 3 inches in diameter. It was more like an hor's doeuvre. And the bathrobe is sized for a 5' 6" 140 lb person. *sigh*

Until next time...

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Eye of Typhoon Talim

t's 6:00 am and the eye of the typhoon has arrived. Calm, somewhat sunny. I expect the winds to be picking up and clouds going in the opposite direction in an hour or two. Might take another stroll, just for fun...

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Warm, Dry and Windy

ust took a walk outside. 4:30 am in Hsinchu. No rain. Felt like 80 mph winds with gusts up to 90. The direction of the typhoon is changing so maybe the eye will miss us. Saw several people riding mopeds in this wind. Taiwanese must be experienced at it. Also noticed that all the trees around the hotel are anchored with four-legged piping. More later. --------

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Douglas Adams

• n the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.
• A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.
• For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.
• He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.
• He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.
• He inched his way up the corridor as if he would rather be yarding his way down it.
• He shifted his weight from foot to foot, but it was equally uncomfortable on each.
• His study was a total mess, like the results of an explosion in a public library.
• Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.
• Humans are not proud of their ancestors, and rarely invite them round to dinner.
• I don't believe it. Prove it to me and I still won't believe it.
• I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
• I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.
• I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge?
• I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons.
• If human beings don't keep exercising their lips, he thought, their mouths probably seize up. After a few months' consideration and observation he abandonded this theory in favor of a new one. If they don't keep on exercising their lips, he thought, their brains start working.
• If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands.
• If somebody thinks they're a hedgehog, presumably you just give 'em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves.
• Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too?
• It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.
• It is a rare mind indeed that can render the hitherto non-existent blindingly obvious. The cry 'I could have thought of that' is a very popular and misleading one, for the fact is that they didn't, and a very significant and revealing fact it is too.
• It is a well-known fact that those people who must want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it... anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.
• Life is wasted on the living.
• Life... is like a grapefruit. It's orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have half a one for breakfast.
• Many men of course became extremely rich, but this was perfectly natural and nothing to be ashamed of because no one was really poor, at least no one worth speaking of.
• One always overcompensates for disabilities. I'm thinking of having my entire body surgically removed.
• Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the drug store, but that's just peanuts to space.
• That young girl is one of the least benightedly unintelligent organic life forms it has been my profound lack of pleasure not to be able to avoid meeting.
• The difficulty with this conversation is that it's very different from most of the ones I've had of late. Which, as I explained, have mostly been with trees.
• The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate.
• The impossible often has a kind of integrity which the merely improbable lacks.
• The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
• The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at and repair.
• The mere thought hadn't even begun to speculate about the merest possibility of crossing my mind.
• The moment at which two people, approaching from opposite ends of a long passageway, recognize each other and immediately pretend they haven t. This is to avoid the ghastly embarrassment of having to continue recognizing each other the whole length of the corridor.
• The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.
• There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
• Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.
• To give real service you must add something which cannot be bought or measured with money, and that is sincerity and integrity.
• We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!
• We have normality. I repeat, we have normality. Anything you still can't cope with is therefore your own problem.
• You live and learn. At any rate, you live.

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Serious Tutoring

wonder why I never got a tutor like this:

Private tutor imparts carnal knowledge to schoolboy

"And I'd always thought she was really serious about education. She certainly gave it her all," a Nagoya educational circles insider tells Josei Seven.

The "she" in question is Mayumi Taniguchi, a 47-year-old home tutor now facing charges for breaking an Aichi Prefectural Government ordinance, aimed at providing youth with a wholesome upbringing, by allegedly seducing a 15-year-old schoolboy and giving him lecherous lessons in a local love hotel.

"She came right out in the questioning session and admitted to bedding the boy. The details of the case haven't been released, but apparently on the night it happened, she told the boy they were out too late and suggested they pass the night away at a love hotel," an investigation insider tells Josei Seven.

Do we call them "love" hotels in Western countries?

*** It is easier for a tutor to command than to teach. John Locke

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Typhoon Talim Update

round 9:00 pm the winds and horizontal rain started. Thunderclaps and a steady low-level bass-toned roar outside my 21st-floor window. Clouds flying by from right to left like a speeded up movie. The government has ordered all schools, government offices and financial offices closed. My employer is having all of us take this day off. (It's 3:00 am as I write this.)

Typhoon Talim is moving at 13 mph with 114 mph winds. (Katrina had 145 mph winds.) What's amazing (or not so amazing) is how nonchalant all the Taiwanese are. This is not like Katrina because these people have these typhoons every year. Everything is built to take them into account. There are government water pumping stations maintained around the country to control flooding. They are prepared. The main dangers are in mountainous areas.

The Chinese news stations show roiling ocean waves, flooding and downed trees, but nothing too devastating yet.

I still see cars on the streets and even a moped in an alley driving around.

The eye should be here in a few hours. I'll take a walk outside when it does.

Otherwise, all is normal and a bit anticlimactic. Maybe I should brave the winds when they start up going the other way. Must find a raincoat first.

It turns out the first 8 floors of the hotel I'm in is a department start with a full supermarket in the basement, so I don't have to go outside for any necessities. The lobby is on the 12th floor. I have three restaurants to choose from.

It's a good life. Wish my wife was here...

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Say Howdy to the Typhoon

an you feel it yet, just by looking at this satellite image? As of 3:00 pm, local time. I will be calling a cab in about an hour or so.

The rain is coming down about 30 degrees off the vertical. Showers, but not monsoon-like yet...

And me without a raincoat.

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August 30, 2005

Some GOOD Polls About Terrorism

onah Goldberg reports the good news about Arab support of the U.S.:

If the war has created more terrorists and made the world hate us more, why exactly has Muslim and Arab opinion of the United States improved?

According to the massive Pew Global Attitudes Survey, views of the United States have been improving. We’re not exactly back to the days when Kuwaiti babies were being named George Bush, but the trends are in our favor. The share of people with a favorable view of America went up in Indonesia by some 23 points, in Lebanon by 15 points, and in Jordan by 16 points. Trends in France, Germany, Russia, and India have been moving our way, too.

But the news gets even better. Support for terrorism and Osama bin Laden has been plummeting across the Arab and Muslim world (save for in Jordan, where the large Palestinian population plays a big role). Support for democracy, meanwhile, has improved. According to Pew, “nearly three-quarters of Moroccans and roughly half of those in Pakistan, Turkey and Indonesia see Islamic extremism as a threat to their countries.” The share of those supporting suicide bombings and the targeting of civilians has fallen by more than one-third in Lebanon — where democracy is on the move, by the way — and by 16 and 27 points in Pakistan and Morocco, respectively. Similar declines in support for Osama bin Laden, al Qaeda, and the like have been recorded.

Isn't that nice? Now, how come I don't hear this all over the news???

One of the polls he refers to is here.

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Typhoon Talim Hits Eastern Taiwan

t's started. At least on the other side of the island. Sounds to me like I'll be awake all night listening to the wind and the rain and the thunderclaps! As long as the power stays on, I will watch movies on my laptop!

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Speaking of Earthquakes...

...check this out! It's an underwater recording of the huge Indonesian earthquake recorded by underwater mikes used to detect nuclear explosions. Put own the headphones and turn up the sound! It's positively eerie! You can read about it here.

Just had a big thunderclap hit here in Taiwan... Sounds like I'm in the Midwest again... Californians are wimps when it comes to tunderstorms. A few rocking cracks and they think the world's coming to an end!

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TinyPhoon

here's a constant breeze now, with a little but of rain... I don't have a raincoat! And I think my umbrella will be pointless!

When I lived in Kansas as a child I remember seeing a tornado. One tore off the observation tower of the radio station my dad worked at in Colby, KXXX.

I live in earthquake country now. Been in a couple. I watch the news and can't understand why people would rather face hurricanes and tornadoes. With hurricanes, you have all that awful anticipation almost EVERY year. Will it hit? Will it veer away? Should I board up the windows and head for the shelter or the in-laws in the next state?

An earthquake is easy. No anticipation, no worries, then WHAMMMM! RRUMBLE RRRUMBLE RRRRUMBLE!!!

In a minute it's over and then it's primarily cleanup and no anticipation or worries for years or decades to come.

Git your butt over hear to earthquake country! Forget this hurricane/typhoon stuff!

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Classic Leading Man

f only it were true! Thanks to Dash, livey, and others for the heads up.

Cary Grant You scored 23% Tough, 19% Roguish, 0% Friendly, and 57% Charming!

You are the epitome of charm and style, the smooth operator who steals the show with your sophisticated wit and quiet confidence. You are able to catch any woman you want just by flashing that disarming smile. When you walk into a room, the women are instantly intrigued and even the men are impressed. When you find yourself in trouble, you are easily able to charm your way out of it, or convince others to help you. You're seen as dashing, suave and romantic. Your co-stars include Katharine Hepburn, Irene Dunne, and Joan Fontaine, stylish women who know a class act when they see it. Find out what kind of classic dame you'd make by taking the Classic Dames Test.

Link: The Classic Leading Man Test written by gidgetgoes on Ok Cupid

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Supertyphoon Talim Loves Me!

o here is a map of Taiwan. I'm staying in a hotel in Hsinchu, on the upper left near the coast.

Now here is the supertyphoon tracking map for Talim:

DOES THIS SUPERTYPHOON HAVE MY NAME ON IT OR WHAT?

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE!!!

NOW THERE IS ANOTHER RIGHT BEHIND IT!!!

And I thought I was going to be bored in Taiwan!!!

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Hello, It's Me

ere I am at my workplace in Taiwan. Without my mustache. That's one of the etch tools on the wall that my company makes and sells.

It's a little after 3:00 am as I post this. Jetlag. No winds yet. The full force of the supertyphoon should hit tomorrow. Should be winds tonight.

I took a "benchmarking" shot out my hotel window yesterday so that I can post the windy shots and you have something to compare them to.

Nothing about it on CNN. Still all Katrina all the time. And on ESPN it's women's logrolling! Oh joy.

Update: Hey, CNN just showed a graphic of supertyphoon Talim! We got about 30 seconds and then back to Katrina.

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Origami You Can Download

ound this cool site. Cool, that is, if you like to do the origami thing. You can download pdfs to make fish, ice cream cones, and flower arrangements (mixing origami and ikebana). Check it out!

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Your Own Rollercoaster

o what do you do if you're an engineer and love rollercoasters? You build your own, of course, in your own backyard. Check out his videos! --------

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Top 10 Ways to Destroy the Earth

kay, I did have to laugh at this, but there's a little part of me that wonders if we are allowing geeks too much leeway and tax monies to pursue their particularly weird specialties. Sam Hughes at LiveScience has come up with a guide the tells us the Top 10 Ways to Destroy the Earth. Not destroy life on earth, but ending the planet as we know it.

Destroying the Earth is harder than you may have been led to believe.

You've seen the action movies where the bad guy threatens to destroy the Earth. You've heard people on the news claiming that the next nuclear war or cutting down rainforests or persisting in releasing hideous quantities of pollution into the atmosphere threatens to end the world.

Fools.

The Earth was built to last.

Yes indeed. So what are the Top 10 Ways? It's worth reading the full text of the entire list, but since you might be in a hurry, here's the Reader's Digest version:

10. Total Existence Failure: You will need: nothing. Method: No method. Simply sit back and twiddle your thumbs as, completely by chance, all 200,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000, 000,000,000,000,000 atoms making up the planet Earth suddenly, simultaneously and spontaneously cease to exist.

9. Gobbled Up By Strangelets: You will need: a stable strangelet. Method: Hijack control of the Relativistic Heavy Ion Collider in Brookhaven National Laboratory, Long Island, New York. Use the RHIC to create and maintain a stable strangelet. Keep it stable for as long as it takes to absorb the entire Earth into a mass of strange quarks.

8. Sucked Into a Microscopic Black Hole: You will need: a microscopic black hole. Method: simply place your black hole on the surface of the Earth and wait.

7. Blown up by matter/antimatter reaction: You will need: 2,500,000,000,000 tons of antimatter. Method: This method involves detonating a bomb so big that it blasts the Earth to pieces.

6. Destroyed by vacuum energy detonation: You will need: a light bulb. Method: This is a fun one. Contemporary scientific theories tell us that ... the volume of space enclosed by a light bulb contains enough vacuum energy to boil every ocean in the world. ... All you need to do is figure out how to extract this energy and harness it in some kind of power plant - this can easily be done without arousing too much suspicion - then surreptitiously allow the reaction to run out of control.

5. Sucked into a giant black hole: You will need: a black hole, extremely powerful rocket engines, and, optionally, a large rocky planetary body. Method: after locating your black hole, you need get it and the Earth together.

4. Meticulously and systematically deconstructed: You will need: a powerful mass driver, or ideally lots of them; ready access to roughly 2*10^32J. Method: Basically, what we're going to do here is dig up the Earth, a big chunk at a time, and boost the whole lot of it into orbit. Yes. All six sextillion tons of it.

3. Pulverized by impact with blunt instrument: You will need: a big heavy rock, something with a bit of a swing to it... perhaps Mars. Method: Essentially, anything can be destroyed if you hit it hard enough. ANYTHING. The concept is simple: find a really, really big asteroid or planet, accelerate it up to some dazzling speed, and smash it into Earth, preferably head-on but whatever you can manage.

2. Eaten by von Neumann machines: You will need: a single von Neumann machine. Method: A von Neumann machine is any device that is capable of creating an exact copy of itself given nothing but the necessary raw materials. Create one of these that subsists almost entirely on iron, magnesium, aluminum and silicon, the major elements found in Earth's mantle and core. It doesn't matter how big it is as long as it can reproduce itself exactly in any period of time. Release it into the ground under the Earth's crust and allow it to fend for itself.

1. Hurled into the sun: You will need: Earthmoving equipment. Method: Hurl the Earth into the Sun.

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August 29, 2005

Guess What? Typhoon Coming!

ell, wouldn't you know it. I've been in Taiwan fewer than 24 hours and there's a typhoon coming, Typhoon Talim, probably hitting Taiwan in two days! Ol' lucky me!

If you check the forecast tracker here, you will see a little island within the circle marked 3118UTC. That little island is WHERE I AM RIGHT NOW!!! In fact it looks like the eye of the typhoon will pass over Hsinchu.

I assume that if the concierge says, "Mr. Alexander, we do not recommend that you leave the hotel today" that I will stay in my room on the 21st floor. I wonder if I will feel the sway of the building with the winds?

According to this map, it will be a category 3 with winds from 111-130 mph just before it hits. doesn't sound so bad considering what Hurricane Katrina is doing to the South.

BTW, in the Atlantic and eastern pacific you call the hurricanes. In the west and south pacific you call them typhoons and in the Indian Ocean you call them cyclones. I think I got that right.

Oh oh...I just found this story at Bloomberg. It could turn into a Category 5 after all... Here's the full text:

Talim, Forecast to Become a Supertyphoon, Heads Toward Taiwan

Aug. 30 (Bloomberg) -- Typhoon Talim is strengthening and may become a supertyphoon as it moves across the Pacific Ocean in the general direction of the northern coast of Taiwan, according to the U.S. Joint Typhoon Warning Center's Web site.

Talim's winds were blowing at a maximum 230 kph (144 mph), with gusts as strong as 276 kph, at 2 a.m. this morning Taipei time, the Hawaii-based center said in an advisory on its Web site.

The center of Talim was located 1,039 kilometers east- southeast of Taipei and 1,124 kilometers east-northeast of the city of Laoag in the Philippines's northern island of Luzon, the advisory said. Talim, the 13th named storm of the typhoon season, has increased speed and is forecast to track west-northwest at 20 kph. Its winds may start being felt on Taiwan's east coast as early as tomorrow.

Winds are expected to strengthen to 250 kph later today with gusts as high as 304 kph, the center said. That would make Talim, which means sharp, or cutting edge, in Tagalog, the language of the Philippines, a Category 5 storm under the Saffir-Simpson scale, or a supertyphoon under Pacific rankings.

Typhoon Matsa earlier this month battered Zhejiang province in China after sweeping past Taipei. The storm, with winds of 144 kph, left at least one person dead and forced the government to evacuate 1.24 million people and shut airports and ports.

Last month, Typhoon Haitang left three people dead and 21 injured, causing $261 million of damage in Zhejiang and Fujian provinces, the official Xinhua news agency reported on July 21. In Taiwan, Haitang left 12 people dead.

Gee. And here I was wondering if I would have anything to write about!!! I should be able to take pictures from my hotel room!!!

I'll keep you all updated.

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Those Darn Georgians

knew that there was sumtin'...different about you Georgians. This news article tells some fo the story:

A twin-engine plane crash landed on its belly at the Eastman-Dodge airport after the two people on board forgot to put down the landing gear.

The Georgia Aviation Technical College plane slid to a halt after scraping down the runway around 12:45 p.m. Wednesday, Eastman Fire Chief Carl Johnson said.

"They didn't know they had a problem until they touched down," Johnson said.

Yep, that's about when you might know sumtin's wrong. And as if that tweren't enuff:

An intern flight instructor and his teacher were practicing single-engine landing and forgot to lower the landing gear, said Johnny Payne, public affairs director with the college.

Heh.
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An Innocent in Taiwan, Day 1

hat's the view from my hotel room on the 21st floor. Dead center is the WinDance Mall, a place I expect to visit more than once since it has the Warner Village Theaters (Warner Brothers / Village Roadshow), which happens to be the most exciting toursit attraction they have in all of Hsinchu.

Ah, Taiwan. The Land of...Well, it was foggy and only 83 degrees when I arrived. Not so bad, except the humidity was 80% and my little free desktop Weather Channel information window tells me that it really feels like 92 degrees. Today it's already 81 degrees and 84% humid at 3:00 am. (The pleasures of jetlag.)

The East China Sea to the north, the South China Sea to the south. And China to the east, where another Chinese general was boasting about using nuclear weapons on the U.S. Somewhere in these nearby waters I hope their is a good aircraft carrier acting as the local sheriff

I had a driver patiently waiting at the Taipei airport to take me the one-hour trip to my hotel. I say patiently because the flight leg from Hong Kong was an hour delayed. I waited outside in the heat, seeing all the varieties of cars (from VWs to Mercedes). I wondered what had been ordered up for me by the hotel? Of course. A nice black Mercedes, which the hotel is happy to charge the company.

My driver called himself "Andy." Andy is married, having taken his honeymoon in Switzerland, and has two boys. He works about 20 hours each day, 6 or 7 days each week. Apparently, Taiwanese like to escape from their families as much as do all people around the world.

He asked what I did. I said training and organizational development. He was still practicing his English so I explained that I helped employees be happier and managers be better managers. Andy then smiled and said, "Ah, you are my idol!" For a moment I thought American Idol had saturated the Asian television market, but now I am convinced that I have my first devoted minion in a grand cult of personality worship that I can build in the 25 days I am here.

We made it to the Ambassador Hotel, tallest building in Hsinchu, which will help keep me from getting lost as I walk around the neighborhood. I unpacked in the room that I will be calling home for a while. Called my lovely wife to assure her that I was not a victim of technology.

Then I took a walk to the nearest 7-11 store. Seriously. One block north, two blocks west. I recognized Coke, Pepsi, Pringles, some gum and candy. The rest could have been byproducts and animal parts as far as I could tell. I say Pringles advisedly, since the one flavor I noticed was French Consumme. There were some cucumber-flavored Lay's potato chip.

I came with little to show for the trip, except hot moisture and sticky clothes.

Well, if there are few sights to see, at least I have a television set to while away the lonely hours. I give you my channel choices in this otherwise very English-friendly hotel:

1. TTV: Chinese
2. CTV: Chinese
3. CTS: Chinese
4. FTV: Chinese
5. TVBS: Chinese
6. TVBSN Chinese
7. MUCH-TV: Japanese with Chinese dubbing
8. ET-NEWS: Chinese Entertainment News
9. DONG HONG TV: Hong Kong Chinese
10. CNN Asia: All Katrina Hurricane All the Time
11. CNBC: Global Version. The Cost of Katrina All the Time
12. BLOOMBERG: They must think business travellers are only interested in business.
13. ESPN: Mostly billiards or dog show competitions, in Chinese.
14. STAR SPORTS: In Chinese
15. GTV: Chinese
16. BBC Asia: All News All the Time. All Katrina or Iraq All the Time.
17. NHK1: Japanese
18. NHK2: Japanese
19. STAR WORLD: Older American Sticoms, like Still Standing, Who's Line Is It Anyway?, Becker...
20. DISOCVERY: (That's how they spell it.) Animals and nature, in Chinese.
21. STAR MOVIE: Chinese movies with commercials.
22. HBO Asia: Older HBO movies and shows. They're just getting Deadwood. I almost started watching Claude Van Damme in Maximum Risk, but thought better of it.
23. MTV: Chinese version.

Th-th-th-that's All, Folks!

I guess there are four or five stations I might glance at occasionally. Good thing I brought a supply of DVDs!

Since I AM an innocent in Taiwan I thought I should keep some of my American roots, so I brought the first and second season of that quintessential 1980s American TV hit series DALLAS. Nothing like good ol'boys making oil deals, screwing the wives of strangers and family fistfightin'. JR Ewing, the self-made American.

I also brought the first two seasons of Stargate SG1, which must have something going for it since it's in its NINTH season. Nothing can replace Babylon 5, but there is always hope.

I also brought several movies, a bunch of Inspector Morse, and a some music concert DVDs on YES and EMERSON, LAKE, and PALMER and THELONIUS MONK.

It's close to 4 am. Time to plan the day, find the fitness room, and dedicate myself to trimming up a little so my wife is pleasantly surprised. If only I can resist comfort food in my loneliness...

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August 27, 2005

An Innocent in Taiwan, Day 0

y flight leaves in 5 hours at 1:20 am. I've got Business Class on Cathay Pacific Airways and sleeping pills, so I might get a few hours sleep before arriving Monday at 10:15 am.

I've decided that since the one time I visited Taiwan it was dark to and from the airport, I did training in the hotel, had jetlag and did not leave the hotel at all, that I am still innocent as a Taiwan tourist.

So as I have the time, I will blog and Innocent's view of Taiwan, probably starting Monday.

Chow!

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August 25, 2005

Taiwan Minus 2 days

fly out for Taiwan Saturday night at 1:20 am (actually Sunday morning). It's 17 hours with a change of flights in Hong Kong. Luckily I'll be in Business Class, which means I may actually get some sleep after watching a few movies. (Long flights are notorious for catching up on movies one hasn't seen.)

Since I'll be staying for 4 weeks, away from wife, away from the cat, away from the new Fall TV season (thank god for TiVO), I'll be packing my own entertainment:

• One digital camera, to upload pictures on the blog to give everyone as much of a taste of Taiwan as possible.
• iPod with 1000s of songs and music.
• DVDs to play on my computer. I've just started Stargate SG1, after several friends recommended it. I didn't realize it's in its NINTH season. Must be good to run so long. I've also packed the first three seasons of Dallas. Go ol' oil boys screwin' and fightin' and dealin' and bakcstabbin'. Also several movies. All playing on my computer.

I'm also packing some books to keep me from going stir crazy:

• The last three Dirk Pitt novels by Clive Cussler. I've been working through the entire series of James-Bond-like fantasy heroics on the high seas and under the ocean. Only three left.
• Shakespeare by Another Name by one Mark Anderson. People often mix us up since we both are active in Shakespeare studies. I've even get a couple of credits in his book for the work I did on Shakespeare's knowledge of law. The Foreword is by actor Derek Jacobi. It's superb. I may post it one day.
• Cryptonomicon by Neal Stephenson. Finally, enough time to focus on this demanding novel.
• The Landmark Thucydides. Nothing like a good, thorough oversized annotative edition with maps of the great classical work The Peloponessian War. I read the Penguin edition in college, but Great Books are wasted on the young, so I will tackle this one on this trip.
• I'll throw in a couple of other mysteries, just in case. Probably one by Peter Robinson and one by Jonathan Kellerman.
• HU CD. One more thing to keep me sane. An entire CD of thousands of people singing HU, that ancient lovesong to God that shows up in many cultures. You can read about it at The HU Page. "When one is united to the core of another,to speak of that is to breathe the name HU, empty of self, filled with love." Jalal al-Din Rumi

And there should be a few movie theatres in the neighborhood. Fortunately I will be staying in a nice hotel rather than a corporate apartment. It will get old, but at least I will have easy access to restaurants, fitness facilities, and laundry and dry cleaning.

Stay tuned for pictures next week and an almost day-by-day account of an ex-pat life in Taiwan.

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August 24, 2005

Yellow Cake in Iraq

et's focus on yellow cake uranium in Iraq for a minute. Here are a some articles, most from The American Thinker, describing yellow cake in Iraq. This I think constitutes legitimate WMD concerns:

Case Not Closed: Iraq’s WMD Stockpiles by Douglas Hanson (March 2004)
Douglas Hanson was a US Army cavalry reconnaissance officer for 20 years, and is a Gulf War I combat veteran. He has a background in radiation biology and physiology, and was an Atomic Demolitions Munitions (ADM) Security Officer, and a Nuclear, Biological, and Chemical Defense Officer. As a civilian analyst, he has worked on stability and support operations in Bosnia, and helped develop a multi-service medical treatment manual for nuclear and radiological casualties. He was initially an operations officer in the operations/intelligence cell of the Requirements Coordination Office of the CPA, and was later assigned as the Chief of Staff of the Ministry of Science and Technology.

Dr. Kay has concluded that Iraq’s key scientists had ended up working directly for Saddam in development of WMD programs, and that they had fooled him into believing in non-existent weapons. My experience, and the character of day to day life in Iraq, indicate just the opposite. We at the MOST have been trying to put 8000 scientists and engineers back to work without their Baathist enforcers and “project managers.” It has been a Herculean task. While the scientific knowledge of the individuals is intact, actually managing complex programs is well beyond the reach of these people.

To assert that the scientists bypassed the Baathist infrastructure, the Iraqi Intelligence Service, and Special Republican Guard commanders, all the while fooling Saddam is, to put it mildly, a real stretch. To this day, many still fear the consequences of cooperating with the ISG. We would need to see the detailed rationale for Dr. Kay’s conclusions on this matter to gauge if Saddam was really fooled by scientists scared to death of him and the Baath Party, or if he ran one of military history’s most successful deception operations. If he did the latter, we must also ask why he would risk the toppling of his regime, and his death or capture, over non-existent WMDs. The only alternative explanation to these two questionable scenarios is that WMD stockpiles did in fact exist, but that they have been hidden, and/or spirited out of the country.

Dr. Kay and the ISG have already proven that Iraq was in violation of several UN resolutions. Their findings include, among others, that Iraq was involved in manufacturing of the biotoxin Ricin “right up to the end,” the restarting of Saddam’s nuclear program, and the development of BW “seed” agents, such as botulinum, that could be used to regenerate stockpiles of BW agents once UN sanctions were lifted.

Here we go again by Douglas Hanson (December 2004)

France had given them tons of yellowcake and low-enriched uranium (LEU) to get their “research” program off the ground. Generally, reactors use uranium enriched to 20 percent, but modern nuclear weapons need about a 93 percent enriched fuel. However, if scientists increase the amount of highly enriched uranium (HEU) in the bomb, a lower level of enrichment can still produce a detonation. The “Little Boy” bomb dropped on Hiroshima was enriched to only 80 percent, yet achieved a yield of 15 kilotons (KT) . So even if the highest level of enrichment was not achieved, Iraq had plenty of raw materials to make up the difference.

About that 500 tons of yellow cake... by Rick Moran (July 2005)

We interrupt this scandal to ask a question that, due to it’s “explosive” nature was never asked when the story broke almost exactly a year ago…

What were 500 tons of yellow cake uranium still doing at the nuclear research center of Al-Tuwaitha in Iraq when American tanks rolled into Bagdhad?

And let's not forget the 2 tons of low-enriched uranium shipped out of Iraq that the U.N. complained about:

U.S. Transferred Nearly 2 Tons of Uranium From Iraq (July 2004)

UNITED NATIONS – The United States didn't have authorization from the U.N. nuclear watchdog when it secretly shipped from Iraq uranium and highly radioactive material that could be used in so-called "dirty bombs," U.N. officials said Wednesday.

The nearly 2 tons of low-enriched uranium and approximately 1,000 highly radioactive items transferred from Iraq to the Untied States last month had been placed under seal by the International Atomic Energy Agency at the sprawling Tuwaitha nuclear complex, 12 miles south of Baghdad, the officials said.

Methinks such uranium is a WMD issue, n'est pas?

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August 23, 2005

Best Movie Clip Ever?

ccording to Extreme Wisdom, this clip with Bob Hope is the best ever. Good for a chuckle. --------

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The "Al Qaeda in Iraq" Debate Continues

'm pulling out comments from a previous post to make it easier to read and access. The debate so far:

hehehe what an absurd article , you could equally say if you answer no to all these questions that come and join the fascist party ..

how odd , anyone can do this .. ... lets swap it all round shall we

do you believe that the Bush administration will achieve success in iraq ?

do you believe that invasion of another countries soveriegn land and the occupation of that land should be defended regardless ?

when 9/11 happened do you immediately think that the terrorists did it for some random bullshit reason like "they hate our freedoms and our way of life" instead of releasing the obvious ie , they hate our policies ?

do you believe that all natural resources on this planet belong to you and if any country refuses to let you have some then you have a right to drop depleted uranium on their children ?

do you feel after the issues of Gitmo and abhu graab and falluja that the military can be trusted to exercise military power effectively ?

do you believe that if you through more troops and money at the jihadist problem that you actually will change the views of muslims and win the war on a noun ?

do you honestly thing bush is like ghandi ?

do you believe that fox news is actually a news company and not an oxymoron ?

do you think it is right to attack people who wish to express their freedom of speech ?

do you believe that bill o'rielly is an ideal american patriot ?

do you wonder why america with all its power is not invading more countries and pushing its weight around even more ?

do you believe that the republicans are so right that companies like fox are with in there rights to make up quotes and fictitious stories about what kerry says and does and refuse to retract any lies until after the election ?

do you believe that american's are smarter then the rest of the world even though less then 20 % of americans own a passport and over 70 % of americans actually thought saddam had something to do with 9/11 ?

do you entertain the thought of leaving the country 'only' when the rest of the world belongs to us ?

do you support the troops even when they use chemical lights to bugger muslims with and when they arrest afghan types some of which are nearly 70 years old and deny them rights under the geneva convention or when they drop bombs onto shelters that are so powerfull that the women and children melt into a single ball of fat that runs like a river through the room ?

do you live off your tax free haven and mock people who earn less money a year then you earn in a month ?

do you believe that the government should keep it damn hands of all this extra money i got through the tax loop holes ?

do you believe the government owes you a refund ?

do you believe that if someone has no money they must be a moron ?

do you believe that you should be able to invade someone elses country and overthrough the government just because you hate what that country stands for ?

do you believe that amnesty international , the red cross etc are just simply wrong when they claim america has human rights issues to address ?

do you believe that democracy delivered by a gun works but it just hasnt been properly applied ?

do you love the idea of meglomania but despise peoples ability to resist it ?

come on , are you really so brainwashed you actually believe your own article ?
osama 08.19.05 - 8:05 am #

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"You are so stuck in an ideology that you do not listen, and you don't respond to evidence and reason that contradicts what you espouse. "

funny , i dont remember the last time anyone from the right had a valid argument that contained 'evidence and reason' regarding IRAQ and the WOT that holds up to much scrutiny , but if your sure they do , lets try a simple one ,

justify our invasion of iraq ?

now remember they had no WMD

we did not have UN support

he was evil yes , but as the cia said he wasnt inside the top 5 nasty list and certainly was as evil as dictators such as those in kurdistain who boil to death those that try to push democracy and we befriended them

there was not any terrorist's in iraq pre 2003

iraq was not a muslim country infact it was multi religious and included catholics in government

the only links to terrorists in iraq were found in the kurdish areas , the people we suported

Osama bin laden and saddam had less chance of becoming friends then coke and pepsi

of course if i am wrong on any 'facts' here then please inform me of my error , it would be a delight to actualy find a single human being on the planet from the right who actually has 'facts' and not rhetoric to respond with

and is able to maintain those views with credibility after some very light scrutiny

i live in hope
Jono 08.19.05 - 9:29 am #

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Hey WitNit!

Osama and Jono have just volunteered to validate your test!

(hee hee)>@_/ (he gleefully quacked as he stirred the pot vigorously!)
VARepublicMan Email Homepage 08.19.05 - 12:10 pm #

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Interesting that osama above thinks that the flip side of my question:

"Do you hope that the Bush Administration will fail in Iraq?"

would be:

"do you believe that the Bush administration will achieve success in iraq?"

You gotta have basic comprehension skills, bubba. The flip side would be:

"Do you hope that the Bush Administration will succeed in Iraq?"

That's quite a difference. But then ideologues aren't interested in conversation, are they? When Rob questioned me, I questioned him. I engaged in a dialogue and I think we both learned something in the process. Same with VAR.

But somehow reading your extended response, there doesn't seem to be much room for a conversation.

Yes, there is a way to create a separate list for rightwing ideologues. They exist and they can be just as wacky.

But right now the far right has less to do with mainstream conservatism, it seems to me, as the far left has to do with mainstream liberalism.

I am saddened to think that today the words and policies of a John F. Kennedy would be regarded as far right conservatism.
WitNit Email Homepage 08.22.05 - 3:27 pm #

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Jono

What are your primary sources for the statements you make? Frankly, there are some you make that have long-since been disproven, such as:

"there was not any terrorist's [sic] in iraq pre 2003"

"the only links to terrorists in iraq were found in the kurdish areas , the people we suported"

Given the current data, these are laughably absurd. Do you examine data, or parrot opinions?
WitNit Email Homepage 08.22.05 - 3:31 pm #

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I agree with Rob. We should try to steer away from the left-right bashing thing. It's wasting time that could be spent discussing the actual issues. As far as I can discern the terms 'left', 'right', 'liberal' and 'conservative' are meaningless labels almost always used to construct strawman arguments.

"Do you basically believe that Americans are ignorant and should not be allowed to make political decisions for themselves?"

Not just most Americans but most people around the world, regardless of political ideologies, are surprisingly ignorant about politics. They have better things to do with their time than read about what one set of liars (Media) say about another set of liars (Politicians).
The COnsigliere Email Homepage 08.22.05 - 4:19 pm #

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woot ! debate ..

Jono
you said
"
What are your primary sources for the statements you make? Frankly, there are some you make that have long-since been disproven, such as:"

"there was not any terrorist's [sic] in iraq pre 2003"

unless you are including al-zarqawi and his imenent arrival in iraq in january 2003 , especially to prepare to fight the US , or are you including the lovely fiction already retracted by our government of saddam sending people to meet al-qaeda ?

but lets be fair , i said to you personally , if any of these 'facts' are wrong then please point out my error , i did not actually expect you to do so without providing a single piece of evidence to support why it is wrong ,

dont tell me it is just pure rhetoric to start with ?

please supply at least two indenpendant (non political) sources of information that proves that "terrorists were in iraq pria to 2003" or of course . just tell me i am wrong ?

it is i that has made the statement and asked a question of you , i believe it was "justify our war in itaq ?"

"the only links to terrorists in iraq were found in the kurdish areas , the people we suported"

again , you deny its truth but without even requiring a non political source you could bubble off to happy fox news land and do a search for al-qeada and iraq and you will find my point

you said "Given the current data, these are laughably absurd. Do you examine data, or parrot opinions"

oh , i see and by your response you have made that clear i see , not a single fact in your response , not a single data point apart from to state that mine are wrong and you complain that all you hear is rhetoric , you ever thought it could be your own voice ?

if my points are wrong tell me HOW it is wrong and WHY it is wrong and WHAT independant source you are using

dont just do the kinder garden routine of "your wrong"

seems your not of to a good start , but i am still waiting for facts we can all check

will wait and see if you try again but it already seems as though my dream of having an educated fact based debate with someone from the right is failing again
jono 08.22.05 - 11:13 pm #

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ps you said to osama "That's quite a difference. But then ideologues aren't interested in conversation, are they?"

hahahaha do you include yourslelf in your response to me

in osama's post you have tried to pick a single issue and highlight it to imply the error of the whole post , BUT you said in your post if you agree with ANY single one of these points then ....

so do you ?

any one of his points ?

just maybe a little tax cut ?

would be interesting to see if you make it to fascist on his scale ?

just wondering

, anyway i will check back later and see if you have any nice little facts or any well formed debatable argument

i am getting a feeling that your all mouth but i hope i am wrong
jono 08.22.05 - 11:22 pm #

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that is funny ..

you actually expect someone to supply a source for an event that they claim did not happen

how odd , can you supply a source that actually shows that NO penquins drove a car around your house last night ? of course not

the criteria was set and it surely is for you to show a source that makes that point invalid ?

you claim to use reason , but have used little in your response
Bob the Builder 08.23.05 - 7:11 am #

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*sigh* Jono, I like the way you set it up: Cite "independent sources." I suspect that that's your way of being able to say when confronted with evidence "Hey, that's a CONSERVATIVE source and they are all proven liars anyway." Then you don't have to deal with evidence.

But I'll give it a shot and see how you respond. I've written about this before, but you're probably new. One indepth source is

The Mother of All Connections

This article is long, detailed and cites sources. I urge you to peruse it carefully and recognize that it simply stands to reason that Al Qaeda has been active in Iraq before the war. If an article such as this is not a good enough starting point for you, and you decide that it's just more lies because of the source, this "debate" will likely be very short.

Good luck. I know how hard it is facing facts that conflict with ideology. I've had to shed mine over the last 20 years. And before you go off convinced thinking I'm merely a dumb conservative, you might want to read my post on

ConsLibModism.

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August 22, 2005

Headlines Japanese Style

apan's Mainichi Daily News just LOVES to play with headlines. With a little too much alliteration:

• Snotty schools see measly manga in new light
• Longful lasses nurture nerds in bid to wean them off wackiness
• Bon-odori: Innocent dance or raunchy bop?
• Japan's hottest actress spices up weekly mags with titillating tease
• Bevy of ninja 'assassins' to serve 'last samurai' Koizumi in election
• Japan's most desirable divorcee gets herself a toy boy
• Starlet discards marriage shackles amid rumors of saucy 'shuffle'
• Cops cap hunt for 'leaking' rapist
• Former Olympic gymnast slips from nation's darling to down-and-out drug addict
• Stinking summer won't let one busy beaver costume-play it cool
• Controversial comic puts bitter touch to Korean craving
• Lonely lasses double as own make-believe friends to portray popularity
• Feisty fogeys fight it out in World Oyaji Battle

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Bored in the Netherlands

hat do you do when you retire to the Netherlands and find out you're bored out of your skull? You begin to have unusual dreams:

A former Hollywood stunt man now living in the Netherlands launched his greatest project to date Tuesday: a 45-foot replica Viking ship made of millions of wooden ice cream sticks and more than a ton of glue.

Rob McDonald named the ship the "Mjollnir" after the hammer of the mythic Norse god of thunder, Thor.

After the 13 ton boat was lifted into the water by crane, "Captain Rob," as he is known, stood calmly on the stern as a team of volunteers rowed the apparently sturdy vessel around the IJ River behind the city's central station.

"I have a dream to show children they can do anything," McDonald said before the launch. "If they can dream it, they can do it."

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Stupid Robbers' Tricks

ne more example why most of the people in prison are there because of sheer stupidity:

A home invasion was solved by a phone's redial button when an accused burglar in this west Georgia town allegedly used the phone to call his mother for a ride after breaking in.

According to sheriff's investigator Alan Lee, a resident of Villa Rice returned home Sunday from a few days out of town and was missing credit cards, a check book, cell phone and jewelry. The victim tried hitting redial on her phone, and the mother of 23-year-old Kevin Tucker answered.

The call led to the arrests of Tucker and 18-year-old Brittany Leigh-Anne Smith, said Lt. Shane Taylor. Taylor said a deputy spoke with Tucker's mother, who said the two had called and asked her to pick them up from the residence.

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Comcast Gets Down!

e careful if you complain to Comcast. They might just get a little testy with you, even resort to formal namecalling:

LaChania Govan said she got bounced around by her cable company when she called to complain. She made dozens of calls and was even transferred to a person who spoke Spanish — a language she doesn't understand.

But when she got her August bill from Comcast she had no trouble understanding she'd made somebody mad. It was addressed to "Bitch Dog."

"I was like you got to be freaking kidding me," said Govan, 25. "I was so mad I couldn't even cuss."

Oooo, I think Comcast has some baaaaad customer service employees. Can they track them down? Yep.

Company officials went through the records and identified two people who were involved with the name change and fired them, Andrews-Keenan said. It's unknown why the employees did it.

Of course, Comcast isn't the only company with such issues:

In another case, Peoples Energy customer Jefferoy Barnes started getting letters addressed to "Jeffery Scrotum Bag Barnes."

"I had no bad words at all. I guess the earliest letter is dated in May and from then on up until now my name has been listed as Jeffery Scrotum Bag Barnes and I have no idea why."

Bad boys!
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Off to Taiwan???

just got word that they are thinking of sending me to Taiwan next week...for a MONTH! Aug. 29-Sept. 23. Four weeks, three weekends.

Excuse me while I try my best to adapt to the culture shock.

AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

That's better...

If they do, I should be put up in a corporate apartment with DSL, I'll bring my digital Canon, grab a Pimsleur 10-lesson introduction to Mandarin Chinese and give you all a tour of what the heck it's like to live in such a place for a month. Assuming the mainland Chinese don't invade while I'm there.

I'll be staying in Taiwan's Silicon Valley Hsinchu. Over an hour's drive from Taipei where all the action is. Apparently geeks don't have much need for sightseeing where they work.

Oh, and September is typhoon month in Taiwan. I'll report, you decide.

Luckily, the intern that has been working with me is from Taiwan, so she'll give me tips on what to do on weekends. At least one weekend I hope to pop over to Hong Kong for the first time and check it out. It's only a 90-minute flight.

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August 21, 2005

Asshole Test

illy Budd at American Dinosaur says you're an asshole if this post doesn't bring a tear to your eye. He might be right. --------

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August 20, 2005

WTF?

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Fictional Fridays

ilk has been smart silly kind enough to invite me to participate in this week's Fictional Fridays.

The rules are simple: use one or all of the images below and write a story of no more than 1000 words.

Here is my humble Femme Noir offering. Enjoy!

SIN CITY

She stood on the balcony of her Paris penthouse hotel room, wearing a sleeveless, black silk Louis Vuitton that stopped just above the inside of her knees. Her calves curved all the way down. I would have liked to have run my hands along those calves.

A black grand piano sat on a riser above the sunken sitting area. A bottle of Dom Perignon Magnum champagne, 1990 vintage, lay half empty on a glass table set on an oval base of solid green jade. A tall, fluted champagne glass lay on its side next to the bottle. A dozen yellow roses in a tall, intricately blown Crystal d'Arques vase framed the back of the bottle. A small card lay open beside it.

The room was lit by two candles on the table, flickering, almost burnt out. The ceilings were high, the walls elegantly wainscoted. Impressionist paintings hung cheerlessly above in shadows. A small fire burned in a classic Louis XV Versailles fireplace. It competed with the slight cold breeze oozing in low through the French doors opening to the balcony.

"I missed you in Egypt," I whispered.

She didn't tense in surprise. She didn't turn around. She couldn't have been older than 32. No taller than five foot four inches. Not thin. Slightly voluptuous, with dark hair pulled back, tightly woven in a donut braid. She stood slightly turned to the right so I could see the flawless curve of the silk directly holding her rounded breast. The nipple, feeling the cold air, pushed hard against the silk.

Her voice was deeper than I expected, earthy, rich, well-traveled.

"The Sphinx is in need of a makeover," she said. "And those pyramids? Just hollowed-out tombs. I don't appreciate life offering such an obvious mirror. I left three days early."

There was no anger in her voice, no bitterness. Just a hint of the weary traveler.

I loosened the buttons on my three-button jacket. I preferred Italian, wearing a black Armani suit, with a black Jersey rayon t-shirt and black Ferragamo Comodore slip-ons. I stepped closer. The Aubusson carpet was thick and soft, masking my approach.

"Paris makes for a much better rendezvous," I said. "A city of sin, a city of art, a city of romance and extremes."

Her ribs expanded with each breath. She wore a necklace of large white pearls. I could see a large brown mole on her right shoulder.

"Paris is ugly," she said. "The smog, the smug people, the dog shit on the sidewalks, the Eiffel Tower looking down like some pretentious hydraulic crane. I don't know why I come back here."

I removed a couple of Gitanes from a case in my lapel, lit both with a mother-of-pearl lighter, and drew in the thick tobacco smoke. I came closer and reached around handing her one of the cigarettes. She took it and placed it between her blood-red lips. She sucked in the smoke and slowly, casually blew it out over the city.

I placed one hand lightly on her shoulder. "I see you received my roses."

"They were lovely." She said it sincerely. I can always tell when they're sincere.

We smoked in silence. She stopped when hers burned halfway, dropping it on the balcony and stepping on it with her black strapless pumps. One of the two candles had finally burned out.

"There's always a place for a little more beauty in this ugly world," I said, flicking my cigarette out over the balcony, letting it drop to the empty street below.

I ran my hand down her arm, stopping at the elbow. "I can take you away from all this," I said. "There's no reason anymore to try to hide in the crowds. No need to wear any masks. No need to be anything they want you to be. Not anymore."

She turned toward me and I let my hand slip from her elbow, trace the curve of her back and rest on her other arm. She looked up at me and I smiled. We took in the look of each other's eyes for the first time.

"Kiss me," she said. "Kiss me, like it was the last kiss you were ever going to give a woman."

I cradled her head with my left hand and leaned over, bringing my lips to hers. She opened her mouth and lightly touched my lips. Hers were warm and soft and luscious. I pressed her body towards mine and kissed her deeply, smelling her champagne fragrance, giving her everything she wanted, giving her the last ounce of dying passion a man could give to a woman. A final scene of passion, tension, and romance.

The final candle burned out.

POP! A flash of light…

The bullet entered professionally just under the ribcage. But it missed the heart. She still had her hand placed in the small of my back. She was stronger than I expected.

She let me down gently, laying me back on the thick, soft Aubusson carpet. I could feel the warm blood flowing through the hole in my jacket. I let go of the suppressor-fitted H&K Mark 23 handgun that I held in my right hand. Only then did I see the small, snub-nosed revolver in hers. It looked like a Charter Arms 38 Special 5-shot. A nice woman's gun.

As my legs grew cold, I noted that she held the gun steady. I closed my eyes.

"I'm sorry, love," I heard her whisper into my ear, and I didn't doubt her. "I changed my mind. You haven't already cashed my check yet, have you?"

FINI

For other stories using the same pictures, check out:

Phoenix at Villains Vanquished.

Heather at Show Angel's Heaven.

TeaFizz.

silk at Ink Blot.

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August 19, 2005

Jane Austen

• t is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man is in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.
• A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of.
• A woman, especially, if she have the misfortune of knowing anything, should conceal it as well as she can.
• An engaged woman is always more agreeable than a disengaged. She is satisfied with herself. Her cares are over, and she feels that she may exert all her powers of pleasing without suspicion. All is safe with a lady engaged; no harm can be done.
• Business, you know, may bring you money, but friendship hardly ever does.
• Every man is surrounded by a neighborhood of voluntary spies.
• For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbors and laugh at them in our turn?
• From politics, it was an easy step to silence.
• Happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance.
• Human nature is so well disposed towards those who are in interesting situations, that a young person, who either marries or dies, is sure of being kindly spoken of.
• I am afraid that the pleasantness of an employment does not always evince its propriety.
• I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal.
• It is always incomprehensible to a man that a woman should ever refuse an offer of marriage.
• It was, perhaps, one of those cases in which advice is good or bad only as the event decides.
• It will, I believe, be everywhere found, that as the clergy are, or are not what they ought to be, so are the rest of the nation.
• Let other pens dwell on guilt and misery.
• Life seems but a quick succession of busy nothings.
• Nobody can tell what I suffer! But it is always so. Those who do not complain are never pitied.
• Nobody minds having what is too good for them.
• One cannot be always laughing at a man without now and then stumbling on something witty.
• One does not love a place the less for having suffered in it, unless it has been all suffering, nothing but suffering.
• One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other.
• One has not great hopes from Birmingham. I always say there is something direful in the sound.
• Single women have a dreadful propensity for being poor. Which is one very strong argument in favor of matrimony.
• Surprises are foolish things. The pleasure is not enhanced, and the inconvenience is often considerable.
• There are certainly are not so many men of large fortune in the world as there are of pretty woman to deserve them.
• There is nothing like staying at home for real comfort.
• Those who do not complain are never pitied.
• To be fond of dancing was a certain step towards falling in love.
• To look almost pretty is an acquisition of higher delight to a girl who has been looking plain for the first fifteen years of her life than a beauty from her cradle can ever receive.
• To sit in the shade on a fine day and look upon verdure is the most perfect refreshment.
• We do not look in our great cities for our best morality.
• We met Dr. Hall in such deep mourning that either his mother, his wife, or himself must be dead.
• What dreadful hot weather we have! It keeps me in a continual state of inelegance.
• Where an opinion is general, it is usually correct.
• Why not seize the pleasure at once? How often is happiness destroyed by preparation, foolish preparation!
• With men he can be rational and unaffected, but when he has ladies to please, every feature works.
• You mistake me, my dear. I have a high respect for your nerves. They are my old friends. I have heard you mention them with consideration these twenty years at least.
• A person who can write a long letter with ease, cannot write ill.
• Nothing is more deceitful than the appearance of humility. It is often only carelessness of opinion, and sometimes an indirect boast.
• It is not time or opportunity that is to determine intimacy; it is disposition alone. Seven years would be insufficient to make some people acquainted with each other, and seven days are more than enough for others.
• Man is more robust than woman, but he is not longer lived; which exactly explains my view of the nature of their attachments.
• If any one faculty of our nature may be called more wonderful than the rest, I do think it is memory. There seems something more speakingly incomprehensible in the powers, the failures, the inequalities of memory, than in any other of our intelligences. The memory is sometimes so retentive, so serviceable, so obedient; at others, so bewildered and so weak; and at others again, so tyrannic, so beyond control! We are, to be sure, a miracle every way; but our powers of recollecting and of forgetting do seem peculiarly past finding out.
• If there is anything disagreeable going on men are always sure to get out of it.
• What strange creatures brothers are!
• A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.
• Silly things do cease to be silly if they are done by sensible people in an impudent way.
• The enthusiasm of a woman's love is even beyond the biographer's.
• But when a young lady is to be a heroine, the perverseness of forty surrounding families cannot prevent her. Something must and will happen to throw a hero in her way.

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August 18, 2005

Cindy Sheehan Changing Minds

at tip to James Taranto for pointing me to Scott Randolph's blog. Cindy Sheehan changed his mind yesterday:

I actually felt myself become a republican today. It was around 10am, when I read the latest update of the Cindy Sheehan saga in CNN.com. I then shot over to read some blogs about it, and perused the comments in some of them, which was nothing but a long series of petty (albeit entertaining) partisan bickering.

Then it happend. The good little democrat in me tied the little noose around his neck and jumped off the stool. He just couldn’t take it anymore.

Just one more example of how former democrat sympathizers are bailing out. Cindy and MoveOn.Org and these anti-war groups have gone off the deep end. They are damaging their own cause. Read the whole thing.
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Another Blog Bites the Dust?

pparently, the tincanman is calling it quits--for now.
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P. G. Wodehouse

• very author really wants to have letters printed in the papers. Unable to make the grade, he drops down a rung of the ladder and writes novels.
• Golf... is the infallible test. The man who can go into a patch of rough alone, with the knowledge that only God is watching him, and play his ball where it lies, is the man who will serve you faithfully and well.
• Has anybody ever seen a dramatic critic in the daytime? Of course not. They come out after dark, up to no good.
• He was a tubby little chap who looked as if he had been poured into his clothes and had forgotten to say "when!"
• He was built on large lines, and seemed to fill the room to overflowing. In physique he was not unlike what Primo Carnera would have been if Carnera hadn't stunted his growth by smoking cigarettes when a boy.
• He was white and shaken, like a dry martini.
• I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled.
• I just sit at a typewriter and curse a bit.
• It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them.
• Madeleine Basset laughed the tinkling, silvery laugh that had got her so disliked by the better element.
• Marriage isn't a process of prolonging the life of love, but of mummifying the corpse.
• Psmith is the only thing in my literary career which was handed to me on a plate with watercress round it, thus enabling me to avoid the blood, sweat and tears inseparable from an author's life.
• She had a penetrating sort of laugh. Rather like a train going into a tunnel.
• Success comes to a writer as a rule, so gradually that it is always something of a shock to him to look back and realize the heights to which he has climbed.
• The Bishop was talking to the local Master of Hounds about the difficulty he had in keeping his vicars off the incense.
• The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.
• The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of the butterflies in the adjoining meadows.
• There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
• To my daughter Leonora without whose never-failing sympathy and encouragement this book would have been finished in half the time.
• Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.
• She was a good cook as cooks go and as cooks go, she went.
• He trusted neither of them as far as he could spit, and he was a poor spitter, lacking both distance and control.
• It was one of those cold, clammy, accusing sort of eyes--the kind that makes you reach up to see if your tie is straight: and he looked at me as I were some sort of unnecessary product which Cuthbert the Cat had brought in after a ramble among the local ash-cans.
• Jeeves lugged my purple socks out of the drawer as if he were a vegetarian fishing a caterpillar out of his salad.
• It was a cold, disapproving gaze, such as a fastidious luncher who was not fond of caterpillars might have directed at one which he had discovered in his portion of salad...
• I turned to Aunt Agatha, whose demeanour was now rather like that of one who, picking daisies on the railway, has just caught the down express on the small of the back.
• You can't stick lighted matches between the toes of an English butler. He would raise his eyebrows and freeze you with a glance. You'd feel as if he had caught you using the wrong fork.
• I don't owe a penny to a single soul--not counting tradesmen, of course.
• The sort of house you look at and say to yourself, "Somebody's Aunt lives there."
• All a publisher has to do is write cheques at intervals, while a lot of deserving and industrious chappies rally round and do the real work.
• "That," I replied cordially, "is what it doesn't do anything else but."
• The shock to Colonel Wedge of finding that what he had taken for a pile of old clothes was alive and a relation by marriage caused him to speak a little sharply.
• He had described Adela as looking like a Welsh rarebit about to come to the height of its fever, and it was such a Welsh rarebit at the critical stage of its preparation that she now resembled.
• Uttered in a certain way--dragged out, if you know what I mean, and starting high up and going down into the lower register, the word "Ah!" can be as sinister and devastating as the word "Ho!"
• It was that strange, almost unearthly light which comes into the eyes of wronged uncles when they see a chance of getting a bit of their own back from erring nephews.
• "Yes, sir," said Jeeves in a low, cold voice, as if he had been bitten in the leg by a personal friend.
• A chap who's supposed to stop chaps pinching things things from chaps having a chap come along and pinch something from him.
• He felt like a man who, chasing rainbows, has had one of them suddenly turn and bite him in the leg.
• Ice formed on the butler's upper slopes.
• It was a confusion of ideas between him and one of the lions he was hunting in Kenya that had caused A. B. Spottsworth to make the obituary column. He thought the lion was dead, and the lion thought it wasn't.
• "I hate you, I hate you!" cried Madeline, a thing I didn't know anyone ever said except in the second act of a musical comedy.

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August 17, 2005

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Poet

nna of Cairo has brought THIS to my attention. But it's only for those of you who read both Harry Potter and T.S. Eliot:

JUNE is the cruellest month, breeding Voldemort out of the dead land, mixing Crucio and Imperius, stirring Harry to behave like a prat. Winter kept us playing Quidditch, flying 5 Around with the stupid sport, ignoring Our coursework until the exams. Spare time surprised us, bringing us to Hogsmeade For a weekend with friends; we went to the inn, And carried on laughing, into the Three Broomsticks, 10 And drank butterbeer, and plotted for an hour. Bin gar keine Dark Wizard, stamm' aus Gryffindor, echt Weasley. And when we were children, staying at the Burrow, My friend's, he took me up on a broom, And I was frightened. He said, 'Mione, 15 'Mione, hold on tight. And up we went. In the country, there you feel free. I read, most of the night, and go back to school in the winter.

Oh there is TONS more!

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The Dark Side

splurged on DVDs yesterday. Bought Kill Bill 1 & 2, and Sin City. Sometimes I worry that I enjoy these kinds of movies so much. I suppose for the same reason I rewatch The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly and Once Upon a Time in the West. "Hardboiled integrity" is how I sum it up. It's not about the blood and guts. It's about personal integrity and how far you are willing to go to achieve your goal. What you're willing to do to get the job done. Taking an agreement to the graveyard and being the instrument of balance when the agreement is broken.

Can't say there are any role models here, but I will watch them over and over again. Enjoying the hell outta them!

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Cats and Catfish

atfish shows off some photos of cats and gators. I wish he'd show us a picture of himself.

Heh!

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How Do You Know?

ugget's friend Nic asks the eternal question which boils down to: "How do I know if I'm in love?"

I don't have THE answer, but I do have AN answer:

When they're nearby you feel warm and improved and the universe seems in balance.

When they're away, your diet takes a nose-dive into pizza and drunkenness, and planets fall into the sun massacering entire civilizations.

There. That should do it.

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Male Birth Control Pill? Never Work!

cientists have worked hard to come up with an effective male birth control pill.

Once again, science is forging ahead without giving the subject much thought. Think about it.

You are a woman, and it's starting to get hot and heavy with the man you met.

Just before the pants come off, you stop him and ask," Hey, did you take your birth control pill?"

And he says, "Uh, yeah I did."

ARE YOU GOING TO BELIEVE HIM?

*** One year they asked me to be poster boy - for birth control. Rodney Dangerfield

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Gaza T-Shirts

rom a New York Sun article:

"...thousands of banners, bumper stickers, mugs, and T-shirts bearing the slogan "Today Gaza and Tomorrow the West Bank and Jerusalem," ...have been widely distributed to Palestinian Arabs in the Gaza Strip, according to a U.N. official."

Isn't that sweet? So who is footing the bill for all those banners, bumper stickers, mugs, and T-shirts? Let me print the ENTIRE paragraph:

"The United Nations bankrolled the production of thousands of banners, bumper stickers, mugs, and T-shirts bearing the slogan "Today Gaza and Tomorrow the West Bank and Jerusalem," which have been widely distributed to Palestinian Arabs in the Gaza Strip, according to a U.N. official."

Your U.N. at work! Via Little Green Footballs.

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Back in College...

had a professor who one day surprised the class with a 100-question quiz. As he passed it out he said, "This is one of my little quizzies."

A woman in back looked at it and said, "If this is one of his little quizzies, I would like to see one of his little testes!"

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Ultimate Blog Security

aked Villainy should have had it! (See post below.)

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August 16, 2005

Hacker Alert!

ooks like Naked Villainy has been targeted! "spykids ownz you" What's that supposed to mean?

Update: It's a malicious script that's been going around. Doesn't sound good. More info here. And here. And here.

Update: They're back online. We can rest easy!

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How To Tell If You Are An Ideological Leftist

re you an Ideological Leftist?

If you can answer YES to even one of the following questions, then you are an Ideological Leftist. You are so stuck in an ideology that you do not listen, and you don't respond to evidence and reason that contradicts what you espouse. You should immediately admit yourself to your local sanitarium.

1. Do you hope that the Bush Administration will fail in Iraq?
   
2. Do you believe that the U.S. is NOT worth fighting for?
   
3. When 9/11 happened, did you immediately think that we deserved it?
   
4. Do you believe that we should not be dependent on foreign oil AND that we should not commence new oil drilling in the U.S.?
5. Do you believe that the government can be trusted to deliver social welfare programs properly and effectively AND that the government cannot be trusted to exercise military power properly and effectively?
   
6. Do you believe that the Jihadists would leave us alone if we only got out of Arab countries and stopped exploiting them for oil?
   
7. Do you honestly think President Bush is like Hitler?
   
8. Do you believe that The New York Times,The Washington Post, ABC, NBC, and CBS conspire NOT to report the despicable truth about the Bush Administration?
   
9. Do you believe that Cindy Sheehan espouses rational arguments?
   
10. Do you believe that Michael Moore is an ideal American patriot?
    
11. Do you seeth with anger at how the U.S. is acting imperially around the world, trying to subject third-world nations to its oppressive agenda?
    
12. Do you believe that Republicans are so evil that it's okay to manipulate votes so other candidates can win even if a majority of Americans did not vote for them?
    
13. Do you basically believe that Americans are ignorant and should not be allowed to make political decisions for themselves?
    
14. Did you entertain the thought of leaving this country if Bush were elected or re-elected President?
    
15. Do you SUPPORT THE TROOPS and at the same time want them NOT to engage in war?
    
16. Do you live off of government funds and spend your day planning which protest or rally to participate in?
    
17. Do you believe the government OWES you a living?

18. Do you believe that if someone is a millionaire, they must be evil?
    
19. Do you believe that people should be allowed to come to the U.S., live off of government funds, be able to vote even if they are not citizens, and be given all the privileges of an American even if they hate what this country stands for?
    
20. Do you believe that the U.S. is more oppressive than Cuba?
    
21. Do you believe that Marxism works, but it just has never been properly applied?
    
22. Do you love the idea of humanity but despise actual people?
    

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Iraq's Answer to Cindy Sheehan

raq the Model has a lucid, passionate answer to Cindy Sheehan, the woman who has said, "I’m going all over the country telling moms: 'This country is not worth dying for.'" Not that she has demonstrated the capacity to grasp the message. But we can:

Ma'am, we asked for your nation's help and we asked you to stand with us in our war and your nation's act was (and still is) an act of ultimate courage and unmatched sense of humanity.

Our request is justified, death was our daily bread and a million Iraqi mothers were expecting death to knock on their doors at any second to claim someone from their families.

Your face doesn't look strange to me at all; I see it everyday on endless numbers of Iraqi women who were struck by losses like yours.

Our fellow country men and women were buried alive, cut to pieces and thrown in acid pools and some were fed to the wild dogs while those who were lucky enough ran away to live like strangers and the Iraqi mother was left to grieve one son buried in an unfound grave and another one living far away who she might not get to see again.

We did nothing to deserve all that suffering, well except for a dream we had; a dream of living like normal people do.

We cried out of joy the day your son and his comrades freed us from the hands of the devil and we went to the streets not believing that the nightmare is over. We practiced our freedom first by kicking and burning the statues and portraits of the hateful idol who stole 35 years from the life of a nation. For the first time air smelled that beautiful, that was the smell of freedom.

Check it out.

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Laughing for Crying

e all have our escapes. Mine is humor. I find things to laugh at or to get outraged at. Both are closely related.

I visited my mom on Sunday. It's an 80-minute drive to the nursing facility. It's brand new, but there's no getting over the nature of the place. People waiting to die. Almost all female. I've seen only one man strapped to a wheelchair.

My mom had started chemotherapy two weeks ago. Since I had been traveling and came back sick, I had avoided seeing her in her weakened condition, waiting to get better. Finally, I got well enough to visit.

The chemo she's taking is experimental. She's the 14th person to be put on it, and although it's been helpful to others, none were as riddled with cancer as she is. She had partially lost her voice and now doesn't feel like getting up. A couple of days before the visit I got a late night call that she had vomited and was dizzy and fell. She's all right but it's not what I would exactly call A Life.

She's bored out of her mind. She's not a reader, so there's no point in my bringing her magazines and books. I did supply her with a nice personal tape player with an endless supply of batteries. She loves music. I brought with me three DVDs of her current favorite musician, Andre Rieu, the Irish violinist who has replaced Yanni as the PBS fundraising favorite for the senior citizen crowd.

She mentioned that she liked Garrison Keillor's Prairie Home Companion stories so I'll start bringing her those tapes each week to help relieve the boredom. She does have a TV which she keeps on the TCM channel for old movies, but she's seen most of them already.

Sometimes life extension seems pointless, but we have a strong desire to survive no matter how painful, because that fear of death is always hanging back there just over our shoulders. Doesn't matter what you believe. For most people, it's still unknown.

She asked me to bring her her scarves and wigs next visit. I feel so tired.

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Dennis Miller

• new poll shows that Senator Kerry's support in the South is strongest amongst blacks. Kerry's appeal to Southern blacks is obvious. He is a white man who lives far, far away.
• A recent conversation: Dubya: Look at the clock, time is racing! Cheney: That's the second hand, George.
• A recent police study found that you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run.
• Born again?! No, I'm not. Excuse me for getting it right the first time.
• Economists predict that this year's federal surplus will be $120 billion less than predicted in January. The missing $120 billion was reportedly last seen on a date with Congressman Gary Condit.
• Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch.
• I lapsed into rude.
• I rant, therefore I am.
• I still feel pangs of remorse over an insidious habit I've had since I was a teenager. About three times a week, I attend estate auctions and make insulting, low-ball bids for prized heirlooms until I'm asked to leave.
• I'm a comedian, for God's sake. Viewers shouldn't trust me. And you know what? They're hip enough to know they shouldn't trust me. I'm just doing stand-up comedy.
• I'm like Bush, I see the world more like checkers than chess.
• If Clinton had only attacked terrorism as much as he attacks George Bush we wouldn't be in this problem.
• If some unemployed punk in New Jersey, can get a cassette to make love to Elle McPherson for $19.95, this virtual reality stuff is going to make crack look like Sanka.
• In the elaborate wardrobe of human emotions, guilt is the itchy wool turtleneck that's three sized too small. Guilt may be difficult to articulate, but when it surfaces, it's as unwelcome and distinct as Jethro Bodine in the lobby of an Ian Shraeger hotel.
• Just put down 9/11... I think, on most things I'm liberal, except on defending ourselves and keeping half the money. Those things I'm kind of conservative on.
• Liberals should not overplay this weapons of mass destruction card, because you want me to tell you the truth? Most of us are not going to care if they don't find these weapons of mass destruction. It's enough for a lot of us to see those kids smiling on that street again.
• Never ever discount the idea of marriage. Sure, someone might tell you that marriage is just a piece of paper. Well, so is money, and what's more life-affirming than cold, hard cash?
• Now, I don't want to get off on a rant here, but guilt is simply God's way of letting you know that you're having too good a time.
• Police in Washington D.C. are now using cameras to catch drivers who go through red lights. Many congressmen this week opposed the use of the red light cameras incorrectly assuming they were being used for surveillance at local brothels.
• President Bush gave his first-ever presidential radio address in both English and Spanish. Reaction was mixed, however, as people were trying to figure out which one was which.
• The average American's day planner has fewer holes in it than Ray Charles's dart board.
• The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country.
• The radical right is so homophobic that they're blaming global warming on the AIDS quilt.
• The Soviet Union, which has complained recently about alleged anti-Soviet themes in American advertising, lodged an official protest this week against the Ford Motor Company's new campaign: 'Hey you stinking fat Russian, get off my Ford Escort.'
• The White House looked into a plan that would allow illegal immigrants to stay in the United States. The plan called for a million Mexicans to marry a million of our ugliest citizens.
• There's no doubt about it, show business lures the people who didn't get enough love, attention, or approval early in life and have grown up to become bottomless, gaping vessels of terrifying, abject need. Please laugh.
• There's nothing wrong with being shallow as long as you're insightful about it.
• Washington, DC is to lying what Wisconsin is to cheese.
• What is guilt? Guilt is the pledge drive constantly hammering in our heads that keeps us from fully enjoying the show. Guilt is the reason they put the articles in Playboy.
• What's so touching is the way we fight the war right until the moment our business is taken care of and then we turn on a dime and we immediately start taking care of people. It's like a shock and aw shucks campaign.

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August 15, 2005

Cambodia Seeks "Special" Tourists

kay. Don't read any further unless you're willing to look into the abyss and can tolerate nausea.

Cambodia wants more tourist income and is willing to offer special services for needy tourists:

Cambodia desperately needs tourist income - one reason it has become a place where westerners go to have sex with children, confident if they're caught they will be able to bribe their way out of jail. Diane Taylor talks to girls who were sold into brothels and escaped, and the people trying to end the trade.

[...]

Those in pursuit of girls can usually find them in brothels; those who want boys tend to recruit them directly on the street. Phnom Penh alone has an estimated 24,000 street children; many live with their parents, but 2,000 have little or no contact with their families and are willing to do almost anything to earn their next meal. The boys picked up by paedophiles tend to combine this "part-time" work with shoe-shining and scavenging for recyclable rubbish.

Read it and weep. Via Banana Oil!
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The NEW Che Shirt

emuel at This Blog Will Be Deleted Tomorrow has the latest Che Guevara image for your t-shirt. It's a classic, subtle, understated, powerful. Check it out!

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Living a Lie

iving a lie will always catch up with you, especially when you impersonate an Ooompa Loompa:

A Reno man who long claimed to have played one of Willy Wonka's Ooompa Loompas in the original 1971 motion picture now admits he was lying.

Ezzy Dame, a high-fashion hairdresser and art enthusiast, confessed the fib Tuesday in an interview with the Reno Gazette-Journal. He said the false claim seemed harmless at the time but grew into a beast of a deception.

A despicable deception!

"There is something so special when a child looks at a little person and they're not scared or feel that they're looking at a freak. When you say you played that part, they look at you and smile. They see you as a human being," he told the newspaper.

Okay, maybe not so despicable...

Dame said the nightmare began two decades ago after he put it on his acting resume under the advice of his agent in Los Angeles.

He was a young man, then 23, 4 feet tall and 90 pounds. Parts for little actors were rare. His agent told him to "pad" his resume with an acting credit from Mel Stuart's 1971 film "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory," he said.

He was young. He didn't understand what he was doing.

Friends and colleagues said they supported Dame for coming forward.

The fact whether Ezzy was or was not an Oompa Loompa makes no difference to me," said Bill Kolton, a friend and Reno arts coordinator. "I know, respect and admire who he is and not any screen part he may have portrayed. He is always the first one to offer his help and service when people are in need."

Okay. He should only get dunked in a chocolate vat...

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Diaper Man

ome guys have a sense of humor that simply goes too far, wouldn't you say?

LONDON (Reuters) - Police said on Monday they were searching for a man wearing just a nappy who approaches women late at night and asks: "Are there any baby changing facilities around here?"

I know it's hard to find a good woman, but there must be a better way of finding a woman willing to change your diaper. --------

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August 14, 2005

A Man and His Rabbit

a gotta admit, some guys are just plain lonely and weird:

SYDNEY: A man faced an Australian court yesterday charged with having sexual relations with a rabbit and the sadistic killing of 17 other rabbits whose carcasses were found dumped in a lane.

Yuck!

In all McMahon was charged with 17 counts of acts of aggravated cruelty upon an animal between July 20 and August 11.

He was further charged with committing an act of bestiality with an animal between 3am and 4am on August 1.

McMahon was further charged with two counts of possession of cannabis.

Oh well, now let's throw the BOOK at him!
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August 13, 2005

25-Word Challenge is Happening

t the tincanman. Go there now and kickstart that story! And don't forget to check out the rather interesting picture that goes with the story:

"Myrtle dusted herself off and straightened her blouse. Damn blogmeets, and now late again. She muttered darkly and pulled her broom out of the pole..."

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Jerry Springer - The Opera

ow can you tell when Armageddon is near? That's right: Jerry Springer, the Opera:

EDINBURGH (Reuters) - The writers of profanity-laden "Jerry Springer - The Opera" are angry.

The creators of the show that caused a record number of complaints when aired on British television say religious censorship is in danger of strangling the arts.

"I am angry that 60,000 people made a judgment without even bothering to see it," said composer Richard Thomas.

I'm shocked, SHOCKED that anyone would prejudge anything related to Jerry Springer!

In the show which was garlanded with theater awards, viewers could watch a diaper fetishist confess all to his true love, catch a tap dance routine by the Ku Klux Klan and see Jesus and the Devil launch into a swearing tirade against each other.

Don't know why THAT would needle religious zealots.

British Christian pressure groups have less political clout than their counterparts in the American Christian right, but Lee and Thomas think the chances of the opera now making it to Broadway are slim.

"The Americans are more nervous than before," Thomas said, adding: "When the Right in America protest, it ends in a global conflict with thousands of civilian deaths.

"I am going to write a show about the Taliban called The Taliban Can Can."

Good move! Go from pissing off the protesting Religious Right to irritating Islamofascist murderous thugs! Smart, guys. SMART! --------

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August 12, 2005

YES and Roger Dean

ax reminds me of my love of the rock group YES. (Don't call them a "progressive" rock band, whatever THAT means. That puts them in a category, and frankly, they carve out they're own unique universe.)

I remember getting Fragile and being stunned by Heart of the Sunrise.

The one lyric that gets me every time I listen to that song, especially the live version on YESSONGS, is the second time Jon Anderson sings "How can the wind with its arms all around me."

I don't know what that line means. I don't know what the song means. At least, I can't logically explain it. All I know is that I understand the sentiment behind the line and behind the song. It's incredibly noble and moving and pure and poignant.

And that is as far as I can go in explaining YES. They're name holds all the meaning and the rest is just words. I suppose you either get YES or you don't. I know Bill Bruford didn't get YES. He admitted as much when he bailed out.

If I could only listen to one YES album the rest of my life, I'd probably choose CLOSE TO THE EDGE.

And You and I has to be one of the perfect YES songs. "And you and I reach out for reasons to call." What can I say? You either get YES or you don't. And then the astonishing full-sided Close to the Edge, which made all of us take Chris Squire seriously and a world-class bassist.

"Called to the seed, right to the sun.
Now that you find, now that you're whole.
Seasons will pass you by,
I get up, I get down. "

You either get YES or you don't.

The other choice, the other album that I would consider instead of CLOSE TO THE EDGE, is RELAYER. Here's the full front/back art.

The Gates of Delirium has some of the most spirited bass work and soaring guitar spirits in music.

"Stand and fight we do consider
Reminded of an inner pact between us
That's seen as we go
And ride there
In motion
To fields in debts of honor
Defending"

And To Be Over...oh my...there goes my heart.

"We go sailing down the calming streams
Drifting endlessly by the bridge
To be over
We will see
To be over"

The thing I think that really helped all of us get YES was the art of Roger Dean. His covers and interiors took us to lands inhabited by people who understood YES lyrics. If you haven't checked it out yet, go to his website at RogerDean.Com.

He now sells his art online, and he is making new works all the time. You can even buy downloads for your desktop art. Here's some good stuff to whet your appetite. ENJOY!

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Heavy Blogging Apology

know I've been blogging a lot lately. I'm sorry. It must be difficult for all my readers who desire sparse, lazy, days-on-end-without-a-post blogging.

It's just that I've been so undepressed and unbusy lately with lots to blog about. I don't have kids. It's embarrassing.

I'll try to cut it down, but it's hard, as I'm sure you know. All I can say is, I apologize. I'll try to blog more lightly.

Sorry.

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Who's Coffee? Yassir!

ash over at The Boiling Point has a new take on the classic Abbott and Costello "Who's On First?" Check it out! --------

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My Other Car is a Bomb

incanman has a funny list of Extremist Muslim Bumber Stickers.

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Is that Ex-lax in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

oogie tells a classic Ex-lax/chocolate story. The Conductor's Revenge! --------

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Car Alarm? What Car Alarm?

hat is the first thing you do when you hear a car alarm? You run out to see who is breaking into someone's car, right? RIIIIGHT! You sit there wondering how long it will take the owner to shut it up.

Admit it: You've actually thought about doing what this guy did:

A man annoyed by a noisy car alarm fired at least three bullets into a Toyota Camry, silencing the alarm and bringing out police who hauled him away in handcuffs, authorities said.

The owner was a sailor who had just returned from an 8-month cruise:

"I mean, that's not a safe guy. I mean, you get upset over an alarm, over a noise like that, (then) there's some little kids making too much noise and he decides to do something awful," sailor Nicholas Moreno, 25, said.

Services for the Camry will be held on Saturday.

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Triple Bypass

elpful Hint to #442: If you are going to secretly have three wives, then for god's sake don't go in for triple bypass heart surgery:

Some people bring flowers. But when Melvyn Reed's three wives showed up to visit him at the hospital, they brought the unexpected end to his years as a bigamist.

British police confirmed Thursday that after Melvyn Reed's marital affairs took a turn for a worse as he recovered from triple bypass surgery — all three of his spouses had turned up at the same time, despite his efforts to stagger their visits.

Media reports say that the wives quickly realized that they were all married to thesame man.

Good to hear that, at least. Aren't men grand? NOTE TO SADIE: Have you done the necessary background checks?

*** Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same. Oscar Wilde

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August 11, 2005

Nursery Crimes

hoenix's Lessons from Fairy Tales got me to thinking about nursery rhymes. As long as I remember, I had alternate versions in my head:

Jack be nimble
Jack be quick
Jack jump over
The OWWWWWW!!!!

Little Miss Muffet, sat on a tuffet,
Eating her curds and whey;
Along came a spider,
Who sat down beside her
And she ate him too!

Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
But not necessarily to fetch a pail of water...

Hickory, dickory, dock,
Two mice ran up the clock.
The clock struck one,
And the other one got away.

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Had Eggs Benedict for breakfast.

Mary had a little lamb
A little beans, a little jam
A little peas, a little toast
A little cheese, and a great big roast
An ice cream sundae topped off with fizz
And boy how sick our Mary is!

*** I came across Mother Goose, so I turned her loose, she was screaming. Jethro Tull

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Radical Leftists

he kind of persons who love humanity but despise actual people.

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Star Warped

kay, the guy admits seeing Star Wars over 400 times. That's a problem right there. But then he goes a step further:

NEW YORK (Reuters) - For those who have never seen the original "Star Wars" trilogy and can't face six hours staring at a screen, a one-man show in New York recounts the whole story in under an hour.

Charles Ross, a 31-year-old actor from Canada who's seen "Star Wars" 400 times, admits his show may be a surreal experience for anybody who does not know the three classic George Lucas films as well as he does.

Yeah. It's a surreal experience reading about it.
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Don't Walk in Brazil

uick: Which is more dangerous? Being a pedestrian in Brazil or being a driver or passenger in a car?

SAO PAULO, Brazil (Reuters) - The number of pedestrians in Sao Paulo killed by vehicles has topped the number of driver and passenger fatalities for the first time, officials in Brazil's biggest city said on Wednesday.

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Posted by witnit at 2:34 PM

One Good Reason to Be a Monk

rappists Monks can brew beer. In fact, they brew the best beer in the world. (That's good news for Eric at Straight White Guy, in case he ever wants to be a monk.)

But the beer at the Belgian Abbey has proved so popular that they Sold Out.

Monks at a Belgian abbey have been forced to stop selling their famous beer after it was voted the best in the world and was promptly sold out.

Why don't they just make more? The monks make an astonishing admission:

"We are not brewers, we are monks. We brew beer to be able to afford being monks," the father abbot said on the abbey's Web site.

Monk Mark Bode told De Morgen daily: "Outsiders don't understand why we are not raising production. But for us life in the abbey comes first, not the brewery."

Bad news for Eric. Maybe the life of a monk is not for him after all.

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August 10, 2005

The Birds Attack Feisty

omewhere, Texas (WitNit Newswire) -- Feisty Christina, blog Diva extraordinaire, expired Monday at her home somewhere near Austin, Texas. A wake is being held by shoe.

Witnesses said the birds did it.

"It was like an Alfred Hitchcock movie," said her neighbor Moogie. "These big black ugly birds swooped down and pecked her to death. One kept screaming over and over, 'Tuesday Diva topic! Tuesday Diva topic!"

"That's right," said Diva silk, another neighbor. "I saw a bird pecking her head cawing 'When's the next blog novel? When's the next blog novel?"

The Men's Club tried to help. "It was no good," said Phin. "All these birds croaking 'The Cotillion! The Cotillion!' and 'Take Two! They're Small.'"

Wizard added, "Chrissy was always trying to be everything for everybody. And here she is. Food for crows. It's sad."

Amelie worked hard to protect her children from seeing her bloody carcass, while one lone ranting raven did try to fend off the birds. "Mommy who?" said Sweet One.

"I was getting on the plane when it happened," said Diva Sadie, from her honeymoon bed. "I wondered, What the f---? and uh...Oh to hell with it. Get out and tell the bellboy to send up more champagne."

Diva Kathy was not available for comment.

Services have not been announced, because there have been some reported sightings of a Christina's doppelganger, and some hope she'll put in an occasional appearance once she realizes that she doesn't have to carry the blog world on her shoulders and have all her spontaneous life energy sucked out of her.

In the meantime, the Demystifying Divas have been retired.

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Battlestar Galaxative

octor, do you have the Cylon ID test completed?

It should be ready in no time, commander.

Strip me naked and do me right here, Gaius.

Stop it! I'm talking! I can't shag you right now!

Excuse me, doctor?

Oh, sorry, commander. I was thinking about something else.

Do me, do me, do me!

I mean, doc, if that was a proposal, don't let protocol get in the way of....

Oh, for frack's sake, Adama!

What did you say, mister?

Fondle my imaginary breasts, Gaius!

Haven't you been paying attention? My behavior! Hasn't it been obvious?

Well, I've been busy. Don't take it personally...

Ah! Ahh! Ahhh!

No, you idiot! I've been erratic, talking to myself... Do you understand what's going on?

We're very enlightened on Galactica, doc. I know these transitions can be hard...

Good Christ, Adama! I'VE GOT A CYLON IN MY HEAD!

Someone call for me?

Get outta here, Bitch! He's mine!

I don't frackin' believe this!

Damn it, Boomer, you're supposed to be in the brig!

Oh yeah. About that. I hope the fact that I'm a Cylon doesn't make you think I don't respect you, sir...

You shot me in the stomach, you insane toaster!

How can you call me that? It's just not fair! I have FEELINGS!

Is there anyone who can rid me of this...THING?

SIR, YES SIR!

Wait a minute! Didn't my contract say I was the only blonde on this show?

SIR, JUST GIVE ME A CIGAR, SIR!

Starbuck, go put this toaster in an airlock!

MY PLEASURE SIR!

(groan) Just end my life now...

If Starbuck kills me, I've got clones. You all auditioned to be humans, didn't you? SUCKERS!

Hat Tip to WuzzaDem, the Master.

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August 9, 2005

Pet Peeves

eez. I was just reading an entry in Wikipedia on Paul Wolfowitz and I came upon this line:

That same year Wolfowitz joined the March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom lead by Martin Luther King, Jr..

That should be "led," folks, as in "led by Martin Luther King, Jr."

"Lead" with the short "e" almost ALWAYS refers to the metal.

Also, "loose" describes screws and shoe laces and is ALWAYS pronounced like "goose." You would never say "I don't think our team would loose the game. that would be "lose the game."

[Soapbox removed. At ease]

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Another Blog Bites the Dust

hristina at Feisty Repartee says farewell to blogland. It's much like a death in the family, but it's an open coffin and you can say goodbye. *sigh* Who's next?

(Isn't the image above COOL? It so perfectly fits...)

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Why Are You Surprised?

ake the quiz: "Which Holy Grail Character Are You?"

God

Every time I try to talk to someone it's 'sorry this' and 'forgive me that' and 'I'm not worthy'. It's like those miserable Psalms-- they're so depressing. Now, knock it off!

HT to Naked Villainy, one of my loyal minions!

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Joke of the Week

park service ranger saw a man walking towards his car carrying a rifle and a paper bag.

"Excuse me, sir, but what's in the bag?" asked the ranger.

"Oh, nothing important," siad the man.

"Please open the bag, Sir. I have to see." The man did and the ranger saw a dead flamingo. It had obviously been shot. The ranger took out his handcuffs. "Flamingos are protected, sir. You're under arrest."

"But I was only hunting for food!" protested the man.

"I'm sorry," said the ranger. He cuffed the man and began walking him toward the station house. "By the way, I've always wondered... What does a flamingo taste like?"

The man thought for a moment and said, "Oh, somewhere between a condor and a bald eagle."

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August 8, 2005

Global Warming Update

cientists rely on computer models to support the theory of Global Warming. Isn't it interesting that a theory has as its prime support a prediction?

More likely, these pseudo-scientists want your money for their "research." Thirty years ago, the theory was the coming Ice Age. And whatever happened to the Population Bomb?

*** Much of the debate over global warming is predicated on fear, rather than science. James Inhofe

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Me and My Simpson

od, I saw this one coming a mile away. Shamefully coopted from Pammy.

I'm Lisa, who are you? by NoHomers.net

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This Says It All

uth at Chaos Theory gives us an unusual graphic of the female brain, which reminds me of this little creation by some engineers:

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August 7, 2005

The Real Theater

he theater at Theater of the Soul is open. And devastatingly brilliant. Stop now and go read. HT Velociman.

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Uncomfortable Truths, II

. Creating Your Life: Uncomfortable Truths, II God had finished creating the earth and invited four angels to help him with the final detail: Where to hide the Truth so that it would require great effort for mankind to find It.

The first angel said, “Place Truth on the highest mountain.” The second said, “Place Truth at the bottom of the ocean.” The third said, “Place Truth deep in the earth.”

The fourth angel said, “Sooner than later humans will seek out the highest mountains, dive to the bottom of the oceans, and explore deep within the earth. Place Truth within man himself. It will be the last place he will ever think to find it.”

What follows is what I’ve been able to put together so far. Any part of it is subject to change without notice based on further personal experience. More of this than you would believe I know firsthand. I may be crazy, but at least you have to admit it is a pluralistic vision that validates pretty much everyone’s place in this world. Take it for what you will. Since I’m not of a proselytizing nature, I pretty much don’t care if you believe any of this or not. I have nothing to prove. All I know for sure is that you are unlikely to have heard it put this way before.

(If you have a strong reaction to what follows, just relax. Take it in as entertainment, as the ramblings of an unusual mind. I'm not dangerous to anyone. Really!)

So, onwards:

• You are Soul, immortal and free.

• Notice that I said you ARE Soul, not that you HAVE a Soul. That’s a big difference. You are not your body. As Soul you take on a body to play in this and other worlds.

• As Soul you have always existed and always will exist. Death is the greatest hoax ever perpetuated on humankind.

• You have lived thousands and perhaps millions of lifetimes, on this world and many others, taking many different bodies and living an endless varieties of lifetimes.

• Everything you can imagine actually exists somewhere. That’s why you can imagine it.

• Even though reincarnation is true, it is not the caricature some make it out to be. Generally speaking, you do not go backwards. The bug you step on is not your dead grandmother.

• This universe, and every other one, exists as a kind of playground and school for Soul. The main law is that you have to live with the consequences of everything that you think, do, and say. What you think, do, and say may come back to you instantly or more likely in other lifetimes. That’s why life may appear to be unfair.

• Life is perfectly fair. There are no victims. Nothing can come to you or be kept away from you except in accordance with your state of consciousness.

• You get to play in these worlds of matter, energy, space, and time as long as there is a role to play that interests you, and as long as you owe a debt; that is, as long as you still have something you thought, did, or say that is waiting to come back to you.

• Every heaven (and hell) exists, and you don’t have to wait until you die to visit.

• There is no sin, nor any spiritual value to fear, guilt, and shame, other than understanding that they can keep you from moving forward.

• You get to play every role: male and female and everything in between, master and slave, rich and poor, black and white and every other color, race, ethnicity, and religious or non-religious background, the great leader and the bad leader, the great follower and the bad follower, the entertainer, the artist, the musician, the scientist, the inventor, the starship captain, and everything else you can imagine.

• The higher worlds are available to you through Soul travel, dreams and other techniques. Like anything else, these are skills that require effort to learn and apply.

• Your dreams are real. Many are symbolic, but some are you leaving your body and visiting actual places and actual people.

• The closest “heaven” to this world is popularly called the Astral plane. This is where you usually go when you dream. The heavens of Hinduism and yogas and many emotional based religions reside here. Paramahansa Yogananda’s book “Autobiography of a Yogi” gives a fair description of this place. Also the Robin Williams movie “What Dreams May Come” gives some interesting examples.

• There are many other "planes." The Causal (past-life records), Mental (the heavens of Buddhism and Christianity reside here...also more Hinduism), Etheric (archetypes and symbols) ...And these don't include the Soul planes, where the real action is. The difficult thing about Soul planes is: they exist beyond language, image, time, and space. Thus, they are rather hard to talk about.

• Most dream books are a waste of time. We each have our own symbols and places we go. You can begin to learn your own dream territory by keeping a dream journal. The more you work to record your dreams, the more you will remember, and the more you will be able to interpret your own dreams.

• Past lives can be recalled, but it is not always a comfortable experience. Usually, it is better to have the experience naturally rather than rely on others to tell you. Charlatans are the rule in this world. Very few people have the ability to tell you your past lives. And those who do rarely will let you know it, or bother to set up shop.

• Every religion, every faith and non-faith, has some truth to it. Every path that everyone is on is legitimate. We are all perfectly at this point where we are supposed to be. Nobody can honestly tell someone else they have their answers.

• The spiritually experienced cannot always be recognized based on appearance. The drunk in the street can be more spiritually advanced than the priest in the pulpit.

• The people who seem to be the most challenging to you in your life are often Souls who volunteered to take on that role so that you'd grow and learn the lesson.

• Sometimes it can take several lifetimes to learn a single lesson.

• No matter where you are in your life, there is a next step. You can always ask life directly to give you more direct hints as to what that next step is. It can come in the form of a Waking Dream; that is, like life is giving you symbols or a scenario to help you wake up to your next step.

• Because your nature is eternal, there is no rush. You don’t have to believe anything right now. You can take it at your own rate. If you like your life as it is, fine. Then stay there. If you want something else, experiment. Maybe there is something here for you.

• Life runs in cycles of Vision, Action, and Balance (Rest).

• Traveling out of the body is a reality that can be learned. Usually it is best to have an experienced guide.

• The best guide is as close to you as your heartbeat and has been with you since the beginning of your journeys into these worlds. You carry the Truth inside you, wherever you are, wherever you go. You are never alone, no matter how hard the lesson you're going through.

• The easiest way to contact this inner teacher is to have a childlike trust in it and your ability to contact it. Just open your heart and ask.

• Imagination is the spiritual key to unlock the higher worlds. Anything you put your attention on will eventually manifest. You are much more the creator of your life than you realize. You can be free. You only need to begin walking out of your self-constructed prisons, since none hold you there but yourself.

• There is a spiritual exercise that you can do. It is based on the word HU. This word is not owned by any religion. In the Oxford English Dictionary definition of “God” you will find HU as one source. HU was the ancient name for the Sphinx in Egypt. It is sung by the Sufis. It is the name of an ancient Celtic God. It is known in many forms in many different teachings. It is the lost chord, the secret word that everyone seeks out.

• HU is a kind of lovesong to God, however you think of God. HU is sung in long drawn-out breaths: HHHHUUUUUUUUUUUU. If you sing it tonight before you go to bed, you might be surprised at the experiences you have.

• The good thing about HU is that you don’t have to go through any religion or any priest or any third-party authority to have direct contact with the spiritual guide and teacher that resides within you and has been your companion since the dawn of your journey.

• Singing HU every day for even 5 minutes (20 minutes is better) will transform your life in incredible ways. (I've been doing it now for almost 30 years.)

• HU can relieve physical pain, and bring emotional stability. It can unlock and release mental fixations.

• The only rule is that if you are smoking pot or using any other illegal psychoactive drug, do not sing HU. It will literally drive you crazy.

• When you sing HU, you may experience Spirit or God (whatever IT is) as Sound and Light. You may see a blue light (or some other color) in your Spiritual Eye, between your eyebrows, or hear a tone or music or tuning fork in your ear. Spirit will communicate in a higher vibratory language. Pay attention when you see or hear these. You may find that you begin to acquire an understanding of things without being told.

• HU also works as spiritual protection. If you are afraid, sing HU. If you are in a dream that scares you, if you remember to sing HU in the dream, you will find yourself immediately transported to a safe place. Incredible, but true. Try it.

• The primary spiritual law of life is, You Gain All By Giving All. What that means will sooner or later come to you. Spiritual Laws are real and in operation whether you believe in them or not: Law of Karma, Law of Harmonics, Law of Economy, Law of Love.

• You are here to learn how to give and receive Divine Love. You will have to first move through all the illusions of love to eventually discover the difference. But again, there is no rush. You have all the time in the universes.

Fairly pluralistic vision, huh? If you happen to try HU and have any interesting experiences you want to share, please let me know. Over time, I may share some of my experiences, dream experiences, waking dreams, out-of-body experiences, and past lives.

That is, if I don’t get beat up too much by my readers. Since I have nothing to prove (or more accurately, nothing I CAN prove), then I don’t really care if anyone believes me or not.

But whenever someone finds something that can benefit others, that can help them become more free as an individual, and release them from constraints, it’s natural to want to share.

You don’t have to believe any of this to experiment and find out firsthand for yourself. Nothing I say needs to be believed. It’s all waiting for your direct, personal experience. That’s more proof than I can ever offer.

By the way, I'm not really all that interested in talking publicly about the actual spiritual path I pursue. But if you try HU for a month and you're getting results, email me and I may talk to you about it. I'm not interested in conversion. Just sharing.

You can download the sound of hundreds of people singing HU here. Put it on your desktop, loop it, and let it play in the background.

Let me know if you would like to see Uncomfortable Truths, III. Although I understand if you think this is enough.

Happy trails.

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August 6, 2005

You Betcha!

ou Are 77% American

You're as American as red meat and shooting ranges. Tough and independent, you think big. You love everything about the US, wrong or right. And anyone who criticizes your home better not do it in front of you!

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Kate's 25-Word Challenge

or a little Dragon's Breath, go to KateSpot and join in on this week's 25-Word Challenge. Add to the story and WIN VALUABLE PRIZES!*

* (Kudos, praise, a warm feeling in the heart...)

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Yer in Trouble

oys will be boys, especially when they're out for revenge. Be nice to your colleagues:

FRANKFORT, Ky. (AP) — A supervisor has been given a summons for allegedly spreading animal urine at a state laboratory and causing its evacuation last week.

James W. Everman, 30, is charged with a single count of criminal use of a noxious substance. The urine, a commercial product used by deer hunters, was dribbled on another supervisor's desk and chair, authorities said.

Gotta love them Germans.

*** I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it. Rodney Dangerfield

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She's Leaving Home, Bye Bye

ome men go to extremes to persuade the wife to hit the road:

A man made up a story about killing a hitchhiker and burying the body in the woods in an effort to persuade his wife to leave him, authorities said.

Teddy Claire Akin, 28, of Ocala, was charged Tuesday with making a false report and petit theft. He was being held without bail.

I don't know what "petit theft" is.

*** My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never. Jack Benny

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Lick my bloody wound, Coach!

ead it and cringe:

A state board voted to publicly reprimand a Central Linn High School teacher and football coach for licking the bleeding wounds of several student athletes.

Ugh!

*** I guess more players lick themselves that are ever licked by an opposing team. The first thing any man has to know is how to handle himself. Connie Mack

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Bye Bye Kitten

itty Sex Kitten is deblogging and has a farewell post. Go say goodbye to one of the finer voices in blogland. --------

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August 5, 2005

My Favorite Blogs

(Sung to the Sound of Music tune, My Favorite Things.)

Acidman, Eric,
And Just Breathe and Feisty,
Boiling Point, Nuggets,
And Pammy and Livey,

Fistful of Fortnights and funny Phin's Blog,
These are a few of my favorite blogs . . .

Thunder and Roses,
And Yabu and Lippy,
Velociman, Gil, Dax,
And Catfish and Billy,

Witty Sex Kitten in Bar Exam bogs,
These are a few of my favorite blogs . . .

Ruth, Anna, Cheesemistress,
Key, Kate and Moogie,
Amelie, Lady Mac,

Phoenix and Kathy,
Pure Naked Villainy, good Basil's Blog,
These are a few of my favorite blogs . . .

When the Feds bite,
When Iraq stings,
When I'm feelin' sad,
I simply remember my favorite blogs,
And then I don't feel… soooo baaaaaaaad . . .

Pirate's Cove, Chablis,
Banana Oil! and Harvey

Flaming Duck, Wizard,
And Vodkapunditry,
Tincanman, Oystersnout, Knuckles, John's blog
These are a few of my favorite blogs. . .

It's A Pundit,
Llama Butchers,
Help me feel more glad,
I simply remember my favorite blogs,
And little by little my heavy heart wogs . . .

And then I don't feel… soooo baaaaaaaad . . .

(Sorry if I couldn't fit you in…I still like you if you're on my blogroll…)

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August 4, 2005

Books as Friends

mentioned recently that I thought J.K. Rowling was single-handedly bringing back to our planet both literacy and the love of good books with her Harry Potter series. I remember wandering the libraries as a child, holding and smelling good old leather-bound volumes on Ancient Egypt and Platonic philosophy and Newton's Mathematical Principles.

I loved, not only reading, but also holding and feeling the novels of Isaac Asimov, Robert Heinlein, and Philip K. Dick. Not just hardbound books, but paperbacks as well. Treasuring the mysteries of Agatha Christie and Ellery Queen and John D. MacDonald.

So after many years of thinking that the youngsters were going too far in the direction of television, movies, and computer games, it's heartening to see them return to the good old-fashioned book. But I wonder how tenuous a hold the book has.

We live in an age where even school principals will occasionally admit not reading books or thinking them out-of-date. I have a friend that admits how he has over 100 books on his Palm Pilot. (Who in the hell can read those darned things? If he can do it, I admire him for it, but where is the feel of the book? Where is the smell of the leather?)

Harlin Ellison, the science-fiction/moral fantasy writer, wrote a brilliant essay in a collection his stories called Strange Wine. The essay was called, "What Killed the Dinosaurs? And You Don't Look So Terrific Yourself." (The next time you're in a bookstore, pick up a copy and read the essay. If you don't like heavy-duty, moralistic science-fiction, then sit in the bookstore and read the essay.)

He would cite random examples of television's impact on society:

How one student rejected reading of books as not real, because it was your imagination, and your imagination is not real.

How kids could have a live person talking to them being filmed on one side of the classroom, while a TV showing the live broadcast sat on the other side of the room, and how the kids would all look at the TV rather than the live person in front of them. Because the TV seemed more real.

How only a small percentage of people by more than a single book a year.

Recently, you may have heard that a poll of college students revealed that fewer than 5% actually read an entire book in the last year.

His thesis was simple: Television puts everything out there in such a way that you do not need to exercise your imagination. In fact, your imagination atrophies without the kind of exercise you get from reading a book, which he notes is a participatory adventure. And unlike television, it requires the reader to activate the book, reinterpret it in personal terms, participate in the creative act. Both the writer and the reader create a world. The template is the book.

Ellison also quotes Issac Asimov from an essay in which he postulates the perfect entertainment cassette:

A cassette as ordinarily viewed makes sound and casts light. That is its purpose, of course, but must sound and light obtrude on others who are not involved or interested? The ideal cassette would be visible and audible only to the person using it.... We could imagine a cassette that is always in perfect adjustment; that starts automatically when you look at it; that stops automatically when you cease to look at it; that can play forward or backward, quickly or slowly, by skips or with repetition, entirely at your pleasure.... Surely, that's the ultimate dream device--a cassette that may deal with any of an infinite number of subjects, fictional or non-fictional, that is self-contained, portable, non-energy-consuming, perfectly private and largely under the control of the will....

Must this remain only a dream? Can we expect to have such a cassette some day?... We not only have it now, we have had it for many centuries. The ideal I have described is the printed word, the book, the object you now hold--light private, and manipulable at will.... Does it seem to you that the book, unlike the cassette I have been describing, does not produce sound and images? It certainly does.... You cannot read without hearing the words in your mind and seeing the images to which they give rise. In fact, they are your sounds and images, not those invented for you by others, and are therefore better.... The printed word presents minimum information, however. Everything but that minimum must be provided by the reader--the intonation of words, the expressions on faces, the actions, the scenery, the background, must all be drawn out of that long line of black-on-white symbols.

The point is, television numbs the imagination, whereas books (and blogs) strengthen it.

The dinosaurs, how they died. The imagination is important, not only for a thriving life, but also for survival. The dinosaurs had no imagination, no ability to be creative and to think themselves through their situations.

Jane Healy wrote a book recently called Endangered Minds: Why Children Don't Think And What We Can Do About It in which she cites studies showing that since the 1970s, and especially since the widespread use of computers, the brains of children are literally different than the brains of their parents. Excessive TV and computer watching has rewired their brains in ways that's significantly different from the brains of those of us brought up as readers.

One of the greatest gifts we can give to the young is the love of reading, the love of books. Not just for the pleasure and the information. But also for the exercise of their imaginations.

For a reader, a book can be just as good as babysitter as a television. (Almost every parent has discovered how you can calm down restless kids by turning on the television. Few reflect on why that actually might be dangerous to their minds.)

And for me, books have always been like real friends. Where else could I hang out with a Socrates or a Shakespeare or a Travis McGee or a Lazarus Long or a Harry Potter? Don't underestimate the power of imagination to make valuable and instructive friends. To have conversations with long-dead minds, even it they are white males (although the idea people have that Socrates would be considered a white male shows some ignorance of the nature of the people of ancient Greece.)

(I should also point out that just as some books are friends, others can be enemies. They can poison you, talk you into behaviors pernicious to your well-being. Convince you to harm yourself and others.)

Good books, and I think good blogs, can fill your life with very real and supportive friends. They can create a community around you that can do much more than your television. As much as I am a fan of TV shows and film, I always strive to put as much time into reading as I do into television watching. Why? Because television numbs the imagination and shortens the attention span, while books nourish the imagination and strengthen the creative faculties.

The dinosaurs lived for millions of years, and when conditions changed, they did not have the creative imagination to survive.

But maybe, with Harry Potter and blogs, our children will have a chance.

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August 3, 2005

Joke of the Week

"Knock knock."

"Who's there?"

"Control Freak. Now you have to answer back, 'Control Freak who?'"

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Otaku Should Get a Life

n Japan, "otaku" are geeks who stay at home and don't have a life. But now the "otaku" are seen as the key to Japan's economic revival:

"Densha Otoko," which tells the story of shy otaku dweeb's attempts at wooing the heart of a beautiful young woman, has been a huge hit, selling over 1 million copies in book form, spawning a movie that has already attracted over 1 million theatergoers, a top-rating TV series and a call girl service. It has also sparked a huge increase in sales among places related to the story, like Benoist, a Tokyo tea room that has seen sales triple since it featured in "Densha Otoko" and Hermes cups, which was the product that gave its name to the book's heroine.

"Densha Otoko" and its tale of innocent love follows on from the huge following attained from "Winter Sonata," the maudlin South Korean TV program that spawned a huge market that has drummed up an estimated 250 billion yen in Japan and South Korea over the past couple of years.

So how can Japan's dweeb population be an economic engine?

"One private think tank has estimated that Japan's otaku population is about 2.8 million. If only half of them fell in love, the economic effects would be enormous, with dating alone likely to generate about 330 billion yen," Kadokawa says. "That sum alone would raise the GDP by 0.1 percent. If the otaku ended up getting married, it could also go a long way to solve problems created by Japan's low birthrate and aging society."

Don't you just love social engineers?

*** As a large collection of male geeks, we don't really know how to encourage/attract these female creatures. We certainly are not doing anything consciously to discourage females from volunteering and helping out. Rasmus Lerdorf

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Why Do Men Have Nipples?

t's a good question, isn't it? But is it enough for an entire book?

New York physician Billy Goldberg, pestered by unusual questions at cocktail parties and other social gatherings over the years, puts the public's mind at ease in his book "Why Do Men Have Nipples?" which hits the book stores on Tuesday.

"It's really remarkable how often you get accosted," said Goldberg, 39. "There are the medical questions from family and friends, and then there are the drunk and outrageous questions where somebody wants to drop their pants and show you a rash or something."

Okay. So WHY do men have nipples?

While only females have mammary glands, we all start out in a similar way in the embryo, the authors explain. The embryo follows a female template until about six weeks, when the male sex chromosome kicks in. Men, however, have already developed nipples.

The idea that we all start out as women kind of puts a crimp in the old Adam-came-first myth. (Of course, being a man, he probably DID come first.)

*** My worst fear is that I'll end up living in some run-down duplex on Wilshire wearing pants hiked up to my nipples and muttering under my breath. Richard Dreyfuss

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Past is Past

n a Past Life...

You Were: A Redhead Magician. Where You Lived: France. How You Died: Decapitation.

Of course, that was just an illusion. I lived long after that in secret! Via livey at Northwoods Woman.

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Uncomfortable Truths, I

reating Your Life 4: Uncomfortable Truths, I

The Story So Far Short Version:

Death is the greatest hoax ever perpetuated on humankind.

Long Version:

I started off this series with The God Game.

• Part 1: I introduce the idea that it's good to recall that it's not necessary to believe in God in order to be a fundamentalist. Then I discussed the meaning of the First Amendment establishment clause regarding freedom of religion, and why all interpretations should rest on defining the limits of the Federal government.
• Part 2: I talk about a certain domain of rationalist skeptics and their limitations of interpreting truth. I also introduce The Micro-Scientific Method, which only can be used to prove truths to oneself, no one else. I end by setting up The God Game.
• Part 3: I give my answer to The God Game, namely that if I were an omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent being, I would create EVERYTHING, and everybody gets to play every possible role.
• Part 4: I introduce The Satan Maneuver, an avoidance tactic used by fundamentalists to avoid uncomfortable truths.

At the same time I wrote the series, Evil Dictionaries And Money.

• Part 1: I talk about how changing definitions is used to control people.
• Part 2: I begin a fairy tale on banking and money.
• Part 3: I finish the fairy tale.
• Part 4: I talk about how manipulative definitions work to change taxation and attack liberty.

Next we explored How The Mind Works.

• Part 1: I talk about how the mind inately possesses blindspots.
• Part 2: I talk about how the picture that people have of themselves can dictate their reality. I also give a technique I successfully used to quit smoking, and more importantly see myself as a non-smoker, not a smoker who has quit.
• Part 3: I introduce the Reticular Activating System, a network of cells in the brain that creates blindspots based on what you believe to be true.
• Part 4: I introduce the Censor, which is part of your subconscious, and how the Censor blinds you to truths. I also talk about ways you can start using the Censor for your own purposes.
• Part 5: I talk about your self-image and how it is related to how you talk to yourself.
• Part 6: How your mind will lock on to things, and then lock out other things. And how people can use this function of your mind against you.
• Part 7: I get personal and then talk about the formula Imagination x Vividness = Reality.
• Part 8: I introduce The Pygmalion Effect, and how the pictures we hold of other people can actually affect them. Also, I talk about how you may have uncritically accepted pictures of yourself from other people.
• Part 9: I talk about Rites of Passage and The Wizard of Oz, and how the world is full of positive and negative wizards.

Finally, I began this series, Creating Your Life.

• Part 1: I talk about how the mind is a good slave but a poor master, and how important it is to be End-Result Oriented in order to achieve your goals.
• Part 2: I talk about how making changes in your life is like Kitchen Remodeling. You have to take out the old kitchen before the new one can be installed. I also mention 12-Year Cycles and how they relate to changes.
• Part 3: I talk about Full Power Imagination and how the image you hold in your mind's eye, with the right attitude and attention, will eventually manifest in "reality."
• Part 4: This post. A summary so far.
• Part 5: Next, some more outrageous propositions and a note about pluralistic tolerance of benign ideas.

On to 5. Creating Your Life: Uncomfortable Truths, II

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Posted by witnit at 8:07 AM

Air America Scandalized

here's a new blog (to my eyes...it's been around since last October) call Radio Equalizer by one Brian Maloney. He takes apart Air America before your very eyes. Check out the bogus Anonynous comments. Leftists can be such cowards and hypocrites.

So far, in seeking to determine whether Air America benefited from taxpayer money meant for a community youth center, we've accomplished two things: sending the blogosphere into action mode and compelling the company to respond to the developing firestorm.

Early Friday morning, I was made aware of a new, second press statement on the Gloria Wise Boys and Girls Club scandal. A number of emails and blog comments quickly followed, leading me to wonder if there was some kind of organized effort to turn the tables.

UPDATE: In the Weekly Standard, Edward Morrisey claims that the MSM is Missing the Perfect Storm by not covering this story.

Mary at Angel Dressed in Black has more.

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August 2, 2005

The Saudis and the Jewish Doctor

rom KeepMedia. Those rascally Saudi princes and their pecadillos:

In mid-July, the mass-circulation Israeli newspaper Yediot Aharonot published in its weekend issue, a several page report on Prof. Mani and his secret encounters within the highest circles of the Arab world including close ties with Saudi King Fahd.

[...]

For months, Prof. Moshe Mani, head of Tel HaShomer’s Urology department, would reportedly disappear from Israel and travel on to London, Rome or Geneva. He would secretly join others on Hashugi’s private Boeing to various Mid-East and European destinations.

Upon his arrival, he would change into silk jalabiyas, which were made especially for him by top Riyadh tailors. His shoes were purchased in special fashionable stores in Morocco. “During all my visits to Saudi Arabia, I would wear this costume. That’s how I managed to fit into Hashugi’s entourage without being suspected by anyone ever”, he said.

And why did the Saudis want a Jewish doctor?

“Hashugi knew the entire truth about me: that I am a Jewish urologist, that I live in Israel, and that I have roots in the Orient.”

“We discussed various medical issues, and at one point, when he mentioned problems of impotence that Royal Arab leaders suffered from, I scribbled on a piece of paper a picture that automatically caught his attention.”

“It was a picture of a prosthesis that we inserted in those days into male sexual organs of various patients that complained of chronic erection problems.”

According to Mani, Hashugi grabbed the drawing and asked for a more detailed explanation. The Saudi billionaire told Mani that he was exactly what Hashugi needed – a man like Mani that felt comfortable in the company of Arabs, one who speaks the language, has European gestures and is a doctor for “problematic” issues. Hashugi reportedly invited Mani to join his entourage.

“There is nothing that an Arab loves more than a Jewish doctor”, Hashugi said.

Indeed. This also points to why you never hear the politically correct crowd demand Affirmative Action programs for airline pilots...

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Redneck Country

EDNECK CAT CARRIER

REDNECK FAUCET

REDNECK PALM PILOT

REDNECK LOTTERY WINNER

REDNECK DOORBELL

REDNECK MAILBOX

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August 1, 2005

Perky Carbs

perform best with the right mix:

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - A Microsoft analyst has won an annual contest celebrating bad writing by comparing fixing carburetors to fondling a woman's breasts.

"As he stared at her ample bosom, he daydreamed of the dual Stromberg carburetors in his vintage Triumph Spitfire, highly functional yet pleasingly formed, perched prominently on top of the intake manifold, aching for experienced hands, the small knurled caps of the oil dampeners begging to be inspected and adjusted as described in chapter seven of the shop manual," went Dan McKay's winning entry in the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest.

*** Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid. Dave Barry
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Large Cups

guess there's just no limit to the desire to profit off the World Cup:

BERLIN (Reuters) - A German company is looking to cash in on an expected boom in the sex trade during next year's soccer World Cup with a 60-room brothel a walk away from Berlin's Olympic Stadium, German media reported Friday.

Named after the virgin huntress of Greek mythology, the "Artemis" complex is due to open for business in September with whirlpool, sauna, cinema, buffet restaurant and a staff of 100 prostitutes, mass circulation daily Bild reported.

Yeah, Baby!

*** Performing enhancing drugs are banned in the Olympics. Ok, we can swing with that. But performance debilitating drugs should not be banned. Smoke a joint and win the hundred meters, fair play to you. That's pretty damn good. Unless someone's dangling a Mars bar off in the distance. Eddie Izzard

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That Ol' Time Religion

ey! How about, "It's against my religion to be put in jail, or be held accountable for my crimes!"

Ya just gotta love the Federal Courts:

SAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) - The California prison system acted improperly when it tried to trim the hair of an American Indian inmate who said a haircut violated his religious beliefs, a U.S. appeals court ruled on Friday.

*** The prisoners eyed the clothes some time, and laughed a good deal among themselves before they put them on. Lewis Tappan

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Fungus Amungus

pparently, some fungus emits an extra raunchy smell:

BERLIN (Reuters) - The odor given off by an unusually large fungus in Germany was so foul that it sparked off a police hunt for a corpse, authorities said Sunday.

Have you checked your feet lately?

*** The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that has been exposed to conference. Fred Allen

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Helen Thomas: Chickens Coming Home

elen Thomas doesn't like it when reporters report what SHE says.

In a column in The Hill, Albert Eisele reports that Helen Thomas told him, "The day I say Dick Cheney is going to run for president, I’ll kill myself. All we need is one more liar. I think he’d like to run, but it would be a sad day for the country if he does."

Now, according to Matt Drudge:

"I'll never talk to a reporter again!" Thomas was overheard saying. "We were just talking -- I was ranting -- and he wrote about it. That isn't right. We all say stuff we don't want printed," Thomas said.

But Eisele said that when he called Thomas, "I assume she knew that we were on the record." "She's obviously very upset about it, but it was a small item -- until Drudge picked it up and broadcast it across the universe," Eisele said.

Still, he noted that reporters aren't that happy when the tables are turned. "Nobody has thinner skin than reporters," Eisele said with a laugh.

Helen Thomas, a compassionate liberal who has fought against mean-spiritedness in politics, said back in 2002 at MIT: "I censored myself for 50 years when I was a reporter. Now I wake up and ask myself, 'Who do I hate today?'"

Run, Cheney, Run!

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